Boys of Few Words: Raising Our Sons to Communicate and Connect

What an awesome book, well written, easy to read, and sooo helpful! I saw my precious son all through out the book, and I finally felt someone understood our present struggles. I have received a lot of guidance via this book, and am eager to put all of it into practice. Everyone with a boy in their life ought to read this one.

Hooray! A smart, energetic, and insightful parenting book. (I've read too many that rely on obvious little snippets such as: "if baby is crying, try comforting him.") This book was more interesting than I expected, and not only discusses important issues but then comes through on the critical part: what to do. The author makes a strong argument for the necessity of developing social and emotional intelligence in our sons, so that they can succeed in contemporary society. According to the author, in past generations, the strong stoic type of man may have been able to remain married and find a job grounded in physical labor, but modern relationships and economies demand a higher level of interpersonal awareness and communication skills. Boys who aren't helped to develop these skills--in ways that do not diminish their sense of masculinity and accomplishment--could be risking social and academic failure. Boys of all ages are discussed, but are divided into three main groups: shy and anxious boys, angry boys, and those who have developmental problems that make communication and relating more difficult. Because the author includes information about all kinds of situations, you might want to use your book as a reference and read the chapters that relate to your own child as it is clearly organized. I read all parts as I found it fascinating and helpful for understanding my son's friends and classmates. There's a particularly good section on dealing with school issues as well.

Reading this book is like taking a course with a great teacher who makes a subject come alive. Many case studies illustrate the author's points, and while there is a lot of depth to the ideas discussed, it's a very personable, approachable read. If you want a new perspective on why your son acts and reacts as he does, as well as practical ways to handle more challenging "boy" moments, read this and be inspired. As Cox says in the epilogue, "raising emotionally healthy boys is not a task for the timid or weak of spirit--it is a job for visionaries, parents who can see the men their sons will become. Parenting our children requires all the energy we can summon. It requires us to keep our wits, look with insight, and forgive ourselves when we make mistakes. It is both a job and a passion. And nothing we will ever do will be as important." Highly recommended.

I highly recommend this book for all parents or caregivers of boys, but especially if you have a boy with learning or attention problems (ADHD). This book not only gives very practical, realistic advice about how to understand your son if he is shy or withdrawn, but also provides great insight into why he may be reluctant to talk and how to bring him out. For many kids with learning disabilities and ADHD, the academic aspect gets focussed on but there can also be social problems at school and in the family. This book addresses both school and family issues, but we found the psychological insights to be extremely helpful in understanding why a fifth-grade boy would be having more trouble in school at this age, and also why he would talk about hobbies and technical things but couldn't tell us why he was getting upset. This book has also helped us understand an older teenager--and know when to step in and when it was fine to give him more space. When communication improves, behavior and respect tend to improve also. We've read some other "self-help" books but this was the first one that seemed to cover all our areas of concern. It's not filled with technical language but it was a "smarter" book than most we've read. Dr. Cox obviously knows about boys and understands what the day to day reality of most families is like. Despite the title, which might imply it's only for "quiet boys," it should be required reading for every parent of boys! We wish we had read this book sooner.

My son age 7 years has difficulty recognising emotions.As a preschooler he was treated for a Specific Language Impairment(comprehension difficulties/language processing difficulties).His speech and language is now age appropriate.I asked the Speech Therapist for ideas to help his emotional understanding.She said I would have to ask the "Autism Professionals" even though my son does not have Autism!
I felt frustrated and misunderstood until I discovered this book. The author knows exactly where my son is coming from.At last I have found validation and help.This book is very readable.You can dip into it as it has an index or else read it chapter by chapter.The author also has an informative web-site.I would highly recommend this book.I only wish that the Professionals involved with my son knew what Dr Adam Cox(author) knows and understands!

I loved this book! It was a great tool to remind me to slow down, talk, and communicate with my two sons. Dr. Cox has a wonderful way to meld real-life examples with his parenting suggestions and I've been able to apply these lessons at home. The author's writing style is friendly & accessible which made it a joy to read. Highly recommended.