It's a letter of complaint for my CPE class.
Would you please correct my mistakes?
Task You have recently been to an event organised by your local community which was attended by large numbers of people. You feel that the event was badly organised and potentially dangerous. Write a letter to the authorities describing the event and expressing your concern.
My letter...
Quote:
Dear sir/madam,
I am writing to complain about the recent musical concert which was organized by our local community and which I consider to have been a major failure.
To begin with, I was in awe of how inconsiderately the organizers scheduled the concert. The whole town had been informed of the imminent snowstorm two weeks before the date of the event and yet nothing was done in order to postpone it. In the end, the concert was held under sever weather conditions.
As far as safety measures were concerned, they were at the very least inadequate. The producers of the show used laser beam spots so as to make the event more spectacular. However, these lasers caused serious eye damage to the vast majority of the audience. Moreover, the people standing on the front rows nearly suffocated during the smoke effects, five of them had to be hospitalized, and all of us got dry eyes.
To make matters worse, the absence of paramedic and rescue teams was no trivial matter. Especially considering the hazardous equipment used in the event, there should have been at least one rescue officer for every hundred people. The ones who got hurt and had to wait for the paramedics to take them to the hospital were lucky enough to survive the concert.
I cannot apprehend why this concert got out of control since it had received a fair amount of publicity and was considered to be the biggest city attraction of the year. I would like you to inform me of you reasons why this production had passed health inspection. At the very least, I would like for the councilors who were responsible for the organization of the event to not only answer to the authorities regarding their indifference over safety and rescue, but also pay the medical bills for all the people who were sublethally hurt and therefore had to be treated in a hospital.
I look forward to hearing from you.
Yours faithfully,
|
Now that I go over it again, I think that maybe I didn't follow the instructions well, cos it said "potentially dangerous". If there were actual accidents, does that mean I'm off topic or not?
Thanks a million in advance