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Originally Posted by Marylin
The original question, though, was to find an idiom that puts the two at the same level. If you marry up, you marry someone a lot more successful than yourself. You step up the social status ladder.
ex. John Kerry marrying Teresa Heinz. Big $$$$
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Exactly ... I was just trying to support my overriding point that when it comes to men and women, our culture promotes differences rather than shared traits (so I offered a couple examples). There are many idioms that support our cultural assumptions (blindspots, discrimination, status quo, etc.) concerning the gender gap (...age gap, economic gap, sexual orientation gap, on and on). Hence, the difficulty this thread is having in finding idioms that match the original question.
Interesting that our informal language usage seems to be more concerned with division rather than partnering; that is if idioms, slang, and social talk are representative indicators. Even religious languange does the same: men and women, good and evil, heterosexual and homosexual, right and wrong, etc.
I think that our language reflects our culture and focus on power differentials, as much as communication itself ... and anglo-saxon cultures (along with many others) tend to be preoccupied with dualistic models, or polarized positions on just about everything. In my thinking, true intelligence and creativity lie in the gray areas inbetween opposing endpoints of black and white.
Maybe we can take this opportunity to create new language and break out of these models? Maybe the question should be, "Can anyone make up a new idiom that shows .....?" New language can shape future cultural assumptions.
One idiom that does promote shared characteristics, but not necessarily between man and woman or bride and groom is "Like two peas in a pod."