 Re: please read the whole context and answer me.
No, in my opinion the corrections were not necessary either for grammar or clarity. Your usage is a little awkward in places, there are some subject-verb agreement errors and some idiomatic usage errors (engaged to her, not with her; Give my regards, not say my regards; etc.). Overall, I think your work is pretty good for a learner.
As a teacher, I would strongly caution you against telling your teacher that he is wrong. |