A rhyme for my girlfriend

[thx0110]

I have some funny stuff for you guys:). Please, correct this rhyme, which is suppose to be for my girlfriend.

You are the one I have been waiting
You ask as the first because you hate waiting

1)Could it be in the first sentence without "for" (... I have been waiting for)? Is "for" necessary in my case?

2)"You ask as the first" - should I cut off "the" or leave it as it is?

3)..because you hate ?the? waiting - with or without an article?

Thanks a lot.

[thx0110]

I have been waiting for

OR

I have been waiting

?

[thx0110]

Is possible to say

You are the girl I have been waiting

OR

You are the girl I have been waiting for.



-----
I know that waiting for is correct, but is there a way to use it without "for"?

[Raymott]

Originally Posted by thx0110

I have some funny stuff for you guys:). Please, correct this rhyme, which is suppose to be for my girlfriend.

You are the one I have been waiting
You ask as the first because you hate waiting

1)Could it be in the first sentence without "for" (... I have been waiting for)? Is "for" necessary in my case?

2)"You ask as the first" - should I cut off "the" or leave it as it is?

3)..because you hate ?the? waiting - with or without an article?

Thanks a lot.

You need to say "waiting for". Another solution is "awaiting", which means "waiting for", but isn't as colloquial. It sounds formal.
You can also say "You are the one for whom I've been waiting".

"You ask as the first" is meaningless. What are you trying to say?

"you hate waiting" No article.

[thx0110]

Originally Posted by Raymott

You need to say "waiting for". Another solution is "awaiting", which means "waiting for", but isn't as colloquial. It sounds formal.
You can also say "You are the one for whom I've been waiting".

"You ask as the first" is meaningless. What are you trying to say?

"you hate waiting" No article.

----
"You ask as the first" - I want to say, that she's the first of us two(she,I), who ask a question or start a dialogue.

Anyway, thanks a lot for your reply. "You are the one for whom I've been waiting" is fine too. :)


Btw. what about this "lethal" romantic combination :) :


You play straight because you hate dating
You are the one for whom I've been waiting

[Raymott]

Originally Posted by thx0110

----
"You ask as the first" - I want to say, that she's the first of us two(she,I), who ask a question or start a dialogue.

You are the one who is/was first to speak.
You broke the silence between us.

Anyway, thanks a lot for your reply. "You are the one for whom I've been waiting" is fine too. :)


Btw. what about this "lethal" romantic combination :) :


You play straight because you hate dating
You are the one for whom I've been waiting

Yep, that's a killer!