pls, correct my resume!!^^

[Unregistered]

I have made a resume to apply a position of early childhood teacher in korea.
I am afraid I will have some mistakes
Pls, correct them as much as u can.
I will appreciate ur help forever.^^

JUNG YUN, KIM

OBJECTIVE
I have just graduated advanced diploma children’s service in Australia, and I have a diploma of fashion design, which will be advantageous in the visual art area. Also, I have professional skills and effective English skills, which were obtained from numerous practices, studies, therefore I assure that I am able to be a delightful and appropriate person for this position. I have not only abundant love and care but also respect and understand children. And I am planning to work on a bachelor degree in early childhood education to consistently develop my knowledge and to provide more quality education to children.

JOB OBJECTIVE
To work on full time position in a early childhood setting that places values on learning through play, self expression, and allowing the implementation of quality early childhood curriculum.

EDUCATION AND TRAINING
lChildren’s Services with Advanced Diploma 06.2006 ~ 03.2007
MEGT College – Sydney, Australia
lChildren’s Services with Certificate III 06.2005 ~ 06.2006
TAFE NSW – Sydney, Australia
lSenior First Aid Certificate 21.09.2005
TAFE NSW – Sydney, Australia
Completed the Senior First Aid course
lIELTS Preparation program 10.2004 ~ 12.2004
St.Marks institution – Sydney, Australia
lESL Program
01.10.2003 ~ 19.12.2003
EAC international language center – Manila, Philippines
Awarded “Excellent Student”
Illustration School holiday program 07.2000 ~ 08.2000
Kook Jae Fashion intuition – Seoul, Korea
Fashion Design with Diploma 03.1998 ~ 02.2001
Kyung Won College – Kyung Gi, Korea
Awarded “ Wining a prize” in J-PAINT (Illustration software) Contest

EMPLOYMENT HISTORY
Retail Assistant – Sydney, Australia 09.2005 ~ 02.2007
Hanama Collection Co., Ltd: Operated a business under franchise of Valley Girl Co., Ltd
Managed low price garments and accessories

Agent (Sales assistant) – Seoul, Korea 04.2001 ~ 06.2003
Storia Trading Co., Ltd: Trading agency
Operated a business with exclusive license of ‘RODEL’, ‘VISCONF’ (ITALY)
Managed high price woven jacket and wool, fur coat

WORK PRACTICES
Mother’s Love Childcare centre 30.10.2006 ~ 10.11.2006
Burwood, Sydney, Australia
Burwood childcare centre
01.08.2006 ~ 01.09.2006
Burwood, Sydney, Australia
lConcord west Long day care center 22.05.2006 ~ 09.06.2006
Concord west, Sydney, Australia
ABC Little Gumtree
17.10.2005 ~ 04.11.2005
Concord west, Sydney, Australia

ACTIVITIES
Working Holiday 03.2004 ~ 02.2005
Brisbane and Sydney, Australia
2002 Youth Passes 01.08.2002~ 06.08.2002
Dae Gu to Jin Ju , Korea

SPECIAL SKILLS
I have intermediate grade computer skill such as Ms - Word, PowerPoint, Excel and I certificated in Senior First Aid. Also, I have skilled in visual art such as drawing and painting. Any challenges that I might be confronted with are truly welcomed.

[Peppers]

- I don't think you can be a delightful candidate for a job, meaning that 'delightful' does not fit the applying for job kind of register


- also to work full time instead of to work on full time position

- an early - not a early

- I am not so sure about placing values on something, you might want to go with laying emphasis on

- I have skilled - I have skills

- are truly welcomed - are truly welcome

These are the ones I picked out, I did not go through the employment history section as this one would invlove some payment anyway, you could work on your formal register more, other than that, it was pretty decent