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Old 06-Apr-2008, 12:06
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Default you have their shoes

Please help me understand the following in bold.

1. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

Is the above just saying "when you criticize them, you put yourself in their position and are free from your own self-centeredness?"

2. automatic or default emotion.

The above is one section of The Emotional Intelligence Assessment Checklist. What kind of emotion is it?

Thank you.
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Old 06-Apr-2008, 15:14
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David L. is a splendid one to beholdDavid L. is a splendid one to beholdDavid L. is a splendid one to beholdDavid L. is a splendid one to beholdDavid L. is a splendid one to beholdDavid L. is a splendid one to beholdDavid L. is a splendid one to beholdDavid L. is a splendid one to behold
Default Re: you have their shoes

We have two expressions:
'put yourself in my shoes' = try to see this situation from my point of view.
'walk a mile in my shoes' = you should try to understand someone before criticizing them.

...That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

This is making it into a joke. Rather than the serious aphorism/pithy observation, it goes on that, if you are a mile away when you criticize you, they can't get at you, attack you back; and you come off even better, because you can steal their shoes!

2. The default/automatic emotion is the emotion most readily seen in the person in daily life. Think of your friends. Whom would you describe as 'a happy soul', 'a sad person', 'an angry person', 'a caring, gentle,tender person', 'an anxious person', 'an excited, on-the-go all the time kind of person'. these are the automatic emotions as far as that checklist is concerned: the basic, over-riding 'personality-type' of the person

Last edited by David L.; 07-Apr-2008 at 02:36.
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Old 07-Apr-2008, 02:24
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Default Re: you have their shoes

Aha! The meaning of the first aphorism is funny.

Thank you.
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