#1  
Old 07-Oct-2004, 06:19
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 618
Default Clear and fine?

If the sentence below is not clear and fine, please improve it.

The number of consenters, who stand for the last two points about the vehicles with low-tech parameters, are less than that of objectors.
  #2  
Old 08-Oct-2004, 12:54
Senior Member
Threadstarter  
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 618
Default

Up! :D
  #3  
Old 08-Oct-2004, 13:55
Casiopea's Avatar
VIP Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Posts: 12,971
Member Type: Other
Default Re: Clear and fine?

Quote:
Originally Posted by NewHope
If the sentence below is not clear and fine, please improve it.

The number of consenters, who stand for the last two points about the vehicles with low-tech parameters, are less than that of objectors.
I'm confused. :? Id on't get the 'who stand for the last two points about the....' part.

What about?

The number of people who consented is less than the number of people who objected.

All the best, :D
  #4  
Old 08-Oct-2004, 16:26
Senior Member
Threadstarter  
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 618
Default

Hi Casiopea,

who stand for the last two points about the ... = who agreed the last two points about the ...

"The last two points":
If there are five point(view)s, then "the last two points" refers to "the fourth point and the fifth point".

Have you got "vehicles with low-tech parameters".

The sentence "The number of people who consented is less than the number of people who objected" is okay. But what they consented?
  #5  
Old 08-Oct-2004, 23:52
Casiopea's Avatar
VIP Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Posts: 12,971
Member Type: Other
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by NewHope
The sentence "The number of people who consented is less than the number of people who objected" is okay. But what they consented?
That's my question, too.
I don't understand what they agreed to exactly.
  #6  
Old 09-Oct-2004, 14:03
Senior Member
Threadstarter  
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 618
Default

Regarding "vehicles with low-tech parameters".

Some machines are the products of high-tech, for example: a computer is a prodct of high-tech, so the computer has its high-tech parameters. Right?

But a toy is just a low-tech product, so the toy has its low-tech parameters.

Some vehicles are the products with low-tech parameters.

Okay, now do you feel the original sentence is clear?

===>>>" The number of consenters, who stand for the last two points about the vehicles with low-tech parameters, are less than that of objectors. "
  #7  
Old 10-Oct-2004, 03:38
Casiopea's Avatar
VIP Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Posts: 12,971
Member Type: Other
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by NewHope
"The number of consenters, who stand for the last two points about the vehicles with low-tech parameters, are less than that of objectors. "
What about?

The number of people who consented/agreed to the last two points on (i.e., regarding) vehicles with low-tech parameters is less than the number of people who objected/disagreed.

All the best, :D
  #8  
Old 10-Oct-2004, 11:26
Senior Member
Threadstarter  
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 618
Default

Good.

But it seems a bit too long.
  #9  
Old 11-Oct-2004, 05:16
Casiopea's Avatar
VIP Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Posts: 12,971
Member Type: Other
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by NewHope
Good.

But it seems a bit too long.
I have faith in you.
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Tags
clear, fine


Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT. The time now is 02:24.



Content Relevant URLs by vBSEO ©2011, Crawlability, Inc.