#1  
Old 05-Jan-2005, 13:30
SunnyLiu
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Question Internet

Dear Sir,

Here is another article I wrote today. Can you amend it for me thoroughly and give me some advices. Thank you very much.



SunnyLiu





Topic: Some people believe that modern technology such as the Internet will replace the book or the written word as the main source of information. Discuss.



Article:



Information technology, especially Internet, has profoundly changed the ways of publishing. Newspapers, magazines and periodicals have for years been published on line and all the texts are now available in digital forms. Some confirm that the digitization of publication will replace the books as the mainstream of information getting. Personally, I agree with these people because I believe that it is not only a symbol of society progress but also an innovation of press industry.



To begin with, e-book occupies little space but has a boundless storage capability. In fact, the Internet enjoys an unlimited storage capability and it is multifunctional, compared with the conventional media such as books and tapes. For example, thousands of volumes can be storied in a tiny PC, which is portability to both business and leisure travelers.



Furthermore, the new technology has a number of advantages over its paper relation. For example, potential lower unit prices, immediate access, adjustable fonts and sizes, large storage capability highly developed search functions, hyperlinks to the internal and Internet resources, speech-generating plug-ins, and the combined use of e-book readers with PDA functions, e-learning applications, music and video playing. Obviously, all these advanced procedures make reading an interesting and convenient process by which readers can not only get useful information but also enjoy maximization of visual satisfaction.



In addition, by using the Internet, we can save natural resources such as forests and water. According to a survey, traditional paper industry consumes more than 300,000,000 trees and contaminates thousands of rivers annually, resulting in the deforestation and desertification. Only by the using of e-books, can we protect the limited natural energy.



In conclusion, e-book may be a panacea to the publishing industry with serious issues due to its multifunction as well as large capacity to storage and eco-friendly nature. It is high time for both individuals and governments paid more attention to the digital lifestyle, which will replace the traditional one.

  #2  
Old 06-Jan-2005, 14:29
SunnyLiu
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Default Re: Internet

Dear Sir,
I hope you can help me and give me some advices about this article.Thank you very much.
Sunny liu
  #3  
Old 08-Jan-2005, 12:50
Mister Micawber's Avatar
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Default Re: Internet


When you are revising your drafts, always look to simplify sentence structure and eliminate redundancies and unnecessary words, Sunny:


'Information technology, especially the Internet, has profoundly changed the ways of publishing. Newspapers, magazines and periodicals have for years been published on line, and most texts are now available in digital form. Some confirm that the digitization of publication will replace books as the mainstream of information acquisition. I believe that it is not only a symbol of social progress but also a sea change in the publishing industry.


To begin with, e-books occupy little space but enjoy a boundless information capacity. In fact, the Internet enjoys an unlimited storage capability and it is multifunctional, compared with conventional media such as books and tapes. For example, thousands of volumes can be stored in a tiny portable computer.

Furthermore, the new technology has a number of advantages over its paper relations: potentially lower unit prices, immediate access, adjustable fonts and sizes, large storage capability, highly developed search functions, hyperlinks to internal and Internet resources, speech-generating plug-ins, and the combined use of e-book readers with PDA functions, e-learning applications, music and video playing. Obviously, all these advanced procedures make reading an interesting and convenient process by which readers can not only acquire useful information but also maximize visual satisfaction.

In addition, by using the Internet, we can save natural resources such as forests and water. According to a survey, the traditional paper industry annually consumes more than 300 million trees and contaminates thousands of rivers, resulting in deforestation and desertification. By using e-books, we can protect our limited natural energy.

In conclusion, e-books may be a panacea for the publishing industry because of their multifunctions, large capacity for storage and eco-friendly nature. It is high time that both individuals and governments paid more attention to the digital lifestyle, which will replace the traditional one.'

  #4  
Old 08-Jan-2005, 19:18
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Default Re: Internet

Re:
Some confirm that the digitization of publication will replace the books as the mainstream of information getting.

I think it would be better there to say think rather than confirm. Thus, I would say:
Some think that the digitization of publication will replace books as the main way of acquiring information.
Do avoid the use of words like personally when you are clearly stating your opinion.

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