thesis

[weston]

is this proper?



Perhaps it's the sense of freedom from societies constraints, the escape of haunting self actualization one confronts after high school, or the need to be within a temporary state of chaos; filled with euphoric highs and sexual independence, which ever the case, college students love to party.

[Raymott]

Perhaps it's the sense of freedom from society's constraints, the escape of haunting self actualization one confronts [?] after high school, or the need to be within a temporary state of chaos, but filled with euphoric highs and sexual independence, whichever the case, college students love to party.
=============
You could use however, for but.
I'm having trouble with: the escape of haunting self actualization one confronts. It's not actually self actualization that escapes or is haunting or that one must confront. It is the need or drive for it.
Maybe, the emergence of the drive for self actualization that begins to haunt one after high school ...

[bhaisahab]

is this proper?



Perhaps it's the sense of freedom from society's constraints, the escape from haunting self actualization one confronts after high school, or the need to be within a temporary state of chaos; filled with euphoric highs and sexual independence, whichever the case, college students love to party.

It's better like that.