Forum newsfeeds
Forum Newsfeeds


Sites for Teachers

Sites for Teachers


Go Back   UsingEnglish.com ESL Forum > Learning English > Editing & Writing Topics
Register FAQDonate Members List Mark Forums Read Tags

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1 (permalink)  
Old 25-Mar-2008, 15:18
Newbie
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Country: Ukraine
Location: Ukraine
First Language: Russian, Ukrainian
Posts: 4
Thanks: 1
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
kvvic is an unknown quantity at this point
Default solving the problem of (technical writing)

This is an introductory sentence from a research paper about superalloys. Could you please check this sentence, first of all, from the stanpoint of style. Specifically, I'm in doubt about the words in bold. Are such phrases acceptable in technical writing or do they sound too cumbersome?
Of course, I'd appreciate any other comments and suggestions.

Development and improvement of technologies for producing novel materials and methods for their protection are a vital prerequisite in solving the problem of ensuring the reliability and high efficiency of stationary and vehicular power plants, as well as in creating new-generation engines.
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
  #2 (permalink)  
Old 26-Mar-2008, 01:00
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Country: USA
Location: Oakland County, Michigan
First Language: American English
Posts: 1,148
Thanks: 8
Thanked 297 Times in 290 Posts
susiedqq is a jewel in the roughsusiedqq is a jewel in the roughsusiedqq is a jewel in the roughsusiedqq is a jewel in the rough
Default Re: solving the problem of (technical writing)

Development and improvement of technologies for producing novel materials and methods for their protection are a vital prerequisite in solving the problem of ensuring the reliability and high efficiency of stationary and vehicular power plants, as well as in creating new-generation engines.

It's grammatically OK, but it will exhaust the reader.

This one will, too:
Development and improvement of technologies for producing novel materials and methods for their protection are vital prerequisites when solving problems of ensuring reliability and high efficiency of stationary or vehicular power plants, as well as creating new-generation engines.
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to susiedqq For This Useful Post:
kvvic (26-Mar-2008)
  #3 (permalink)  
Old 26-Mar-2008, 02:22
Newbie
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Country: Ukraine
Location: Ukraine
First Language: Russian, Ukrainian
Posts: 4
Thanks: 1
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
kvvic is an unknown quantity at this point
Default Re: solving the problem of (technical writing)

Then I'll throw out "solving problems of". This won't change the meaning and the sentence will be a little bit easier to read, I hope.

Development and improvement of technologies for producing novel materials and methods for their protection are vital prerequisites when ensuring reliability and high efficiency of stationary or vehicular power plants, as well as creating new-generation engines.

...ensuring [zero article] reliability and high efficiency...
Could you please explain it to me? There're no articles in my mother tongue and so I don't always use them properly. I thought ...the reliability and high efficiency... would mean the degree of reliability and the level of efficiency that are required of the power plants.

Last edited by kvvic : 26-Mar-2008 at 03:08.
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
  #4 (permalink)  
Old 26-Mar-2008, 11:50
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Country: USA
Location: Oakland County, Michigan
First Language: American English
Posts: 1,148
Thanks: 8
Thanked 297 Times in 290 Posts
susiedqq is a jewel in the roughsusiedqq is a jewel in the roughsusiedqq is a jewel in the roughsusiedqq is a jewel in the rough
Default Re: solving the problem of (technical writing)

The articles are not necessary. They can be placed there, if you wish.

I felt it "tightened up" this lengthly sentence without them.
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
  #5 (permalink)  
Old 27-Mar-2008, 06:17
Newbie
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Country: Ukraine
Location: Ukraine
First Language: Russian, Ukrainian
Posts: 4
Thanks: 1
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
kvvic is an unknown quantity at this point
Default Re: solving the problem of (technical writing)

Thanks again for the explanation. It's not that I wish to place the article. I'm just trying to understand when the articles are necessary and when they're not.
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Reply
Tags: , ,




Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
editing hashem Editing & Writing Topics 2 14-Jan-2008 23:52
Tenses in technical writing nyggus Ask a Teacher 4 21-Dec-2007 17:55
letter writing problem Unregistered Ask a Teacher 1 17-Apr-2007 03:53
Technical Writing namratagogoi CVs, Resumes and Applications 4 24-Feb-2007 08:26
Where to start improving my English writing Callisto Ask a Teacher 3 09-Feb-2007 12:23


All times are GMT. The time now is 08:28.



vBulletin, Copyright ©2000 - 2008, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.1.0
Copyright © 2002 - 2008 UsingEnglish.com