help in write an essay

new_ · Jul 26, 2011

hi for all
i have good chance for
come here with you
friends i try to write an essay
about famous peoples i write this
Paragraphs

Famous people come upon them in their lives a lot of harassment from other people
And journalists and so on, and this, in my view is tax fame, as it is
Got the fame and love of his people and bringing them to him is something delightful
And positive, and on the other hand, when they go to a place or to a special leave
Others find they are looking for and trying to take pictures with him that will give him discomfort and bewilderment.
I see from my point of view that every star or a famous person must possess two capacities
A basic culture and patience, the culture can deal with others and telegraphic style
Well, as well as he can to change them and affects them for the better and this is something good happens
Him for his community, and the patience he can be more resilient to the pressures that come to him
From others, by adjusting to the atmosphere.
On the other hand, as well as the people or the public in the sense that the healthier should be more paper
And balanced and more wisdom in dealing with their favorite, you should bear in mind their particular circumstances
And desires and rituals, and enable them.
in the end I would like to say that the fame and money is not everything in life, love of people and affected your
Is the greatest thing that could come out of this life
any one have notes or get errors in spelling or Grammar or have an extra for this essay
can correct to me

Raymott · Jul 26, 2011

new_ said:
hi for all
i have good chance for
come here with you
friends i try to write an essay
about famous peoples i write this
Paragraphs

Famous people come upon them in their lives a lot of harassment from other people
And journalists and so on, and this, in my view is tax fame, as it is
Got the fame and love of his people and bringing them to him is something delightful
And positive, and on the other hand, when they go to a place or to a special leave
Others find they are looking for and trying to take pictures with him that will give him discomfort and bewilderment.
I see from my point of view that every star or a famous person must possess two capacities
A basic culture and patience, the culture can deal with others and telegraphic style
Well, as well as he can to change them and affects them for the better and this is something good happens
Him for his community, and the patience he can be more resilient to the pressures that come to him
From others, by adjusting to the atmosphere.
On the other hand, as well as the people or the public in the sense that the healthier should be more paper
And balanced and more wisdom in dealing with their favorite, you should bear in mind their particular circumstances
And desires and rituals, and enable them.
in the end I would like to say that the fame and money is not everything in life, love of people and affected your
Is the greatest thing that could come out of this life
any one have notes or get errors in spelling or Grammar or have an extra for this essay
can correct to me

Hello new.
You've come to the right place.
This is not an essay.
Were you taught to write like this? Is this how you've seen essays in English set out? Why are you starting new lines with capital letters? Where are your fullstops (periods) at the end of a sentence? You can't simply start a new line in the middle of a sentence.

It is very difficult to understand what you are saying. You might have seen poems using (something like) this sort of structure, but this is not right for an essay. I'd advise you to fix it and repost it. You can fix it by arranging it into sentences that begin with a capital letter, end with a period, and do not break arbitrarily across lines. That will be a start.

new_ · Jul 27, 2011

friend i would to thank you first
and i update my essay to this

Famous people come upon them in their lives a lot of harassment. From other people

And journalists and so on.

I think from my point of view this is the fame tax .Them are

Got the fame and love of the people and bringing them to him is something delightful

And positive. But ,on the other hand, when them go to any place or to a special holiday will see the

Others looking for them, chase them, and trying to take pictures with them. This will be effect on this special life and take them in discomfort and bewilderment.[FONT=&quot].[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]: [/FONT]I see from my point of view that every star or a famous person must possess two capacities first one

.the culture and the second is the patience. The culture can deal with others by good style

Well, as well as he can to change them and affects them for the better and this is something good happens

Him for his community, and the patience he can be more resilient to the pressures that come to him

From others, by adjusting to the atmosphere.

On the other hand, as well as the people or the public in the sense that the healthier should be more paper .

And balanced and more wisdom in dealing with their favorite, you should bear in mind their particular circumstances

.And desires and rituals, and enable them[FONT=&quot].[/FONT]

On the end I would like to say that the fame and money is not everything in life, love of people and affected your

.Is the greatest thing that could come out of its life

can you give me your opinion and help me
thanks

Raymott · Jul 28, 2011

Are you taking the piss?
In English, we align to the left. Open any book printed in English to find out how to correctly write in English. Any book. Or even any message here written by a native. You could even use this short post as an example.

You might have missed the part where I advised not to start each line with a capital letter, and not to arbitrarily break sentences across lines.
Can you explain to me how you've learnt to write English at this level without observing these pre-basic level conventions? Don't your teachers care? I'm honestly interested.

new_ · Jul 29, 2011

friend sorry but i think the problem in site or something other
i modify the essay to this now
Famous people come upon on them in their lives a lot of harassment from other people like journalists, fans and son on .And this ,in my point of view is the fame tax.

When them got the fame and love of others and affection them to him is something delightful and positive . And on the other hand, when they go to a place or to a special leave. Others will be looking for them and trying and trying to take pictures with them. That is will make to them discomfort and annoyance. I see from my point of view that every star or a famous person must posses two capacities. A basic culture and patience. The culture can enable them to deal with others by good style .And by patience them can dealing with discomfort and annoyance. By culture any star or a famous person can change and affects for the better .I think this is a very important thing and something good from him to his community . The patience is very important by it them can be more resilient to the pressures that come to them from others . on the other hand, as well as to that the people or the public in the sense that the healthier must be more mannerly And balanced and more wisdom in dealing with their favorite stars. You should bear in mind their particular ,their circumstances ,their desires and their rituals. And you must enable them to practice their favorite thing easily.

On the end I would like to say that the fame and money is not everything in life. Love of people and your affected them to the better is the greatest thing that could come out of your life.
now can you help me in this essay friend

Raymott · Jul 29, 2011

new_ said:
Friend, sorry, but i think the problem in site or something other.
I modify the essay to this now.

Famous people [STRIKE]come upon on them[/STRIKE] bring upon themselves in their lives a lot of harassment from other people like journalists, fans and so[STRIKE]n[/STRIKE] on .And this ,in my point of view is the fame tax.
"... her son on. And this, in my point of view ..."
[Note the spaces around the punctuation. The space comes after the mark, not before it.

When they get [STRIKE]the [/STRIKE]fame and love of others and affection [STRIKE]them to him[/STRIKE] it is something delightful and positive to them. [STRIKE]And [/STRIKE] On the other hand, when they go to a place or to a special leave, others will be looking for them and trying and trying to take pictures with them. That [STRIKE]is [/STRIKE]will [STRIKE]make to[/STRIKE] cause them discomfort and annoyance. I [STRIKE]see from my point of view[/STRIKE] believe that every star or [STRIKE]a[/STRIKE] famous person must posses two capacities: a basic culture and patience. The culture can enable them to deal with others by good style .And by patience they can deal[STRIKE]ing[/STRIKE] with discomfort and annoyance. By culture any star or [STRIKE]a[/STRIKE] famous person can change and affects for the better .I think this is a very important thing and something good from him to his community. Patience is very important by it them can be more resilient to the pressures that come to them from others. On the other hand, as well as to that the people or the public in the sense that the healthier [what?] must be more mannerly and balanced and more wise in dealing with their favorite stars. You should bear in mind their particular [what?] ,their circumstances ,their desires and their rituals. And you must enable them to practice their favorite thing easily.
To end I would like to say that [STRIKE]the [/STRIKE]fame and money is not everything in life. Love of people and your affected them to the better is the greatest thing that could come out of your life.
now can you help me in this essay friend

I've corrected some of your errors. A full correction would require a re-write. I suggest that you study the corrections I've made, and try to understand the error you've made in each case.

new_ · Jul 30, 2011

friend thanks a lot
and you advert to some grammar mistakes
can you tell me what about writing mistakes
like commas and fullstops

Raymott · Jul 30, 2011

new_ said:
friend thanks a lot
and you advert to some grammar mistakes
can you tell me what about writing mistakes
like commas and fullstops

The way to learn is to follow some of the rest of the threads here that you can understand. And ask specific questions about things that you don't understand.

konungursvia · Jul 30, 2011

Raymott said:
Are you taking the piss?
In English, we align to the left. Open any book printed in English to find out how to correctly write in English. Any book. Or even any message here written by a native. You could even use this short post as an example.

You might have missed the part where I advised not to start each line with a capital letter, and not to arbitrarily break sentences across lines.
Can you explain to me how you've learnt to write English at this level without observing these pre-basic level conventions? Don't your teachers care? I'm honestly interested.

I've noticed that when you're using Arabic or Hebrew software, even when set to English, it sometimes aligns wrong.

I think he or she is actually mimicking a poetic form, reminiscent of e.e. cummings, rather than a real essay.

help in write an essay

new_

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Raymott

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new_

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Raymott

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new_

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new_

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Raymott

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konungursvia

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