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    sarat_106 is offline Key Member
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    Post Re: Would you mind correcting grammar,punctuation,article, some else in my paragraphs

    Hi dotrunghieu, welcome to the forum. Here is your story with a few corrections. There can be many different ways of modifying the same to improve the language further.
    The story is (talk) about a generous (large) woman’s encounter witha naughty boy. The name of the woman is Luella Bates Washington Jones, and that of the boy is Roger. The woman was walking alone, when a boy ran to her (up) from behind and tried to snatch her purse. The boy was however overpowered by the (defeated.) woman who kicked him until his teeth rattled. Then (First,) she (called) asked him (must) to pick up her pocketbook, and (she) began to talk with him. Their conversation was focused on as to ( is about) why he snatched her purse? He said that he wanted to buy a pair of blue suede shoes which prompted him (tried) to do so (snatch her purse ) (because). Then, she took him (and he went) to her house because she wanted to have more talk with (to) him. There he sat (was sitting) on the far side of a room while she was cooking,. The thought that he could go out or take away (took) her purse; never came to her mind. (She did not care nevertheless,) Till then the boy (he did) had not trusted the woman nor she (not to) trusted him. They ate, but the woman did not ask (had asked) the boy’s whereabouts nor about his family (anything about where he lived, or his folks, or anything else) lest that might (would) embarrass him. She told him about her job, and what the work was like. Next, she cut for him a half of her ten-cent cake. After that, she gave him ten dollars, and wanted him to buy a pair of blue suede shoes. She (and) did not make the mistake of latching onto her pocketbook nor anything (nobody) else. Lastly, she led him down the hall to the front and opened it. She said, "Goodnight! Behave yourself!", and the boy said. "Thank you, m'am,". He never saw her again.

    I like this story because the story (talk) tells about love of the woman with a strange boy, without expecting in return. (and she don't need everything from the boy.) The boy learned a (studied) lesson that touched (the same) me. These are examples of love and trust.
    Delete words in brackets not underlined.
    Last edited by sarat_106; 13-Jul-2009 at 06:47.

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