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  1. #1
    kid101 is offline Newbie
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    Exclamation Could you correct my essay?

    This is cause and effect essay on flooding. Could you help me to check it? because i am not good at writing, so i try my best. Thank for reading and correcting.

    CAUSE AND EFFECT ESSAY ON FLOODING

    The weather has been signification changing in these days due to global warming. Flood is one of the main consequences of changing weather in term of heavy rainfall. Flood can cause lots of damaging to the environment such as crops, people and houses. This essay will explore some causes and effects of flooding and offer some solutions.

    There are several causes of flooding which consist of heavy rain, human made and poor infrastructure. First, heavy rain is one of the main reasons of flooding in some big city in Vietnam such as in Hanoi. To illustrate, The article’ another downpour, more flooding hassle Hanoi residents, officials’ (2009) stated the Ha Noi city has been flooded by last three hours of heavy rain and made most of streets in Ha Noi inundated. Second, the poor infrastructure was the main reason made Ha Noi suffered from flood. For instance,why the flood rising so quick after had a heavy rain is that the drainage system of city is only afford with rainfall ranging from 50- 100 millimetres while the rainfall was measured around 129 millimetres.(’ another downpour, more flooding hassle Hanoi residents, officials’ 2009). Finally, the flood is not only come from natural but also come from human made. The global surface has been changing by human activities by upgrading infrastructure such as houses, building, streets, parking places, use concrete. Thus, that’s why there are more floods in inside big cities than in rural areas when a heavy rain comes down (McGuire 2008).

    There are a number of effects of flooding. First, flood is not only a natural disaster but also become a tragedy for human. In September 2007, there was a heavy flood hit very poor places in West and Central Africa. There were a hundred of people found death and homeless (Niles 2007). Second, the flood is not a cause of deadly but with a small flood can definitely hassle big area like in Ha Noi city. It made people come to the offices late, motorbike and cars broke down, some areas was isolated like an islands and made the traffic getting worse.(‘another downpour, more flooding hassle Hanoi residents, officials’ 2009). Finally, there is more risk for people after flood such as pandemic and diseases. The UNICEF has been watching very closely for cholera and malaria which can kill children very fast (Niles 2007).

    In conclusion, this essay has just discussed some causes and effects of flooding. Moreover, people concern more about the flood today and trying to reduce the negative impact of flood on the human and environment. In order to prevent the flood on the planet and reduce its harms to the people life, the government should enlarge the lakes, canals and rivers to give space for waterways (Ngo Trung Hai cited in Tuyet Nhung 2008). In addition, the government should planting more trees and educate people an important of growing trees and protecting jungles, take an action immediately after flood happened by giving people access to medical care and food. By this way, people can reduce the harm of natural disaster and human made.
    Last edited by kid101; 30-Aug-2009 at 17:39.

  2. #2
    pyoung is offline Senior Member
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    Re: Could you correct my essay?

    Dear kid101:

    Wow! You have put a lot of time and energy into your writing. Here are some suggestions:

    CAUSE AND EFFECT ESSAY ON FLOODING

    The weather has been significantly changing [in these days] recently due to global warming. Flooding is one of the main consequences of changing weather. [in terms of heavy rainfall]. Floods can cause lots of damage to the environment, [affecting crops, people and houses]. This essay will explore some causes and effects of flooding and offer some solutions.


    The weather has been significantly changing [in these days] recently due to global warming.
    Because your essay is about the causes and effects of flooding, it might be better to omit your first sentence (or place it elsewhere). Your second sentence is clearer and lets the reader know what you will be discussing.

    [in terms of heavy rainfall]
    What does this mean? Do you want to say, 'Rainfall levels have increased (in some parts of the world),' or 'Rainfall patterns have changed,' or 'Rainfall totals have increased,' or something else? It's good to be specific about your examples.

    [affecting crops, people and houses]
    Damage to crops and houses affects people, so this is really just one category. Perhaps you could say something like, 'Flooding affects not only lives of people, but also those of plants and animals through destruction of natural habitats and growth cycles.'

    This essay will explore some causes and effects of flooding and offer some solutions.
    Offering solutions is outside the topic of 'causes and effects'. It's also more work. Are you sure you want to include this?

    I hope this is helpful,

    Petra



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