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  1. #1
    hieppham90 is offline Newbie
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    Please grade and comment this essay. Thanks very very much :)

    Topic: Agree or not? Schools allow students to learn at least one course of culture of the country rather than their own.

    Knowing about the culture of one’s own country is very important. But not everyone pays attention to this and many others donot know the way to study it well. In my opinion, schools entirely should allow students to learn at least one course of the country rather than their own. There are three reasons for my statement.
    By learning in a course, students can have a good method to reach the best result. Culture is a social science and is not easy to study at all. If self-studying, a student needs a very long time to have a good command of the subject. As well as the risk of falsely defining method of studying, students can be discouraged and skip in the middle of learning because of the toughness of the science which is widely known to be hard to grasp. But if he is allowed to study in a course which is carefully organized and has a good curriculum, he can make progress much faster and more effectively.
    Courses on country culture organized by schools can effectively force students to learn the subject more seriously. Nowadays, with the hasty pace of the modern life, there are more and more kinds of entertainment that attract youngsters. The more easily they get into these seducements, the more difficultly they get out of these to concentrate on something that is hard to learn like culture of a country. It’s very important to know about the country’s culture because this is one of the most effective ways to confirm the nationality of a person. He has to know how his country’s culture is to show it to the foreigners and to be proud of his country’s long history.
    Managing on tiny budget seems to be the problem of many schools, especially those which are initiatively founded. Among ways of raising working capital, setting up courses is a sensible and reasonable one. By establishing courses on new subject like culture, these schools can raise more money to support their activities. Such action can help both the schools and students: Not only helping students with their study, the courses provide schools with money and financial aids from learning fee.
    Loving one’s own country is among ways to live better and more happily in the society. Once a person understands deeply about his hometown, he will attach more closely to it and try to make it more spacious and modern. So, a course on culture is important. I myself appreciate the tradition and culture of my country, if my school founded such course, I would attended it right away.

  2. #2
    Ann1977 is offline Senior Member
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    Re: Please grade and comment this essay. Thanks very very much :)

    This essay is organized well, and the student devoted an appropriate amount of time and effort. The English is pretty good, and it is always understandable. The spelling is good, and the student made a gallant effort to come up with three reasons to agree.

    The most serious problem is that the student has missed the point of the prompt completely -- not that it is entirely his fault if it was printed just as it is here.

    The prompt says:
    Topic: Agree or not? Schools allow students to learn at least one course of culture of the country
    rather than their own.

    The prompt should say:
    Topic: Agree or not? Schools should allow students to take at least one course in the culture of a country
    besides their own.


    The student has misinterpreted the prompt to mean: Should schools offer a course in culture, or should students have to learn this on their own?

    But what it actually means is: Should schools offer courses on the culture of foreign countries?


    Last edited by Ann1977; 07-Oct-2009 at 08:46.

  3. #3
    hieppham90 is offline Newbie
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    Re: Please grade and comment this essay. Thanks very very much :)

    Thank you very much for your comment.
    As a matter of fact, my essay is written far away from the true topic, and now I want you to comment and grade my essay if the topic here were "Should schools offer a course in culture, or should students have to learn this on their own?"
    Thank you in advance

  4. #4
    candy_kute is offline Newbie
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    Re: Please grade and comment this essay. Thanks very very much :)

    chi la ng `viet nam dung hem :D nice to meet u

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