Toefl Essay:the computers and the book, what is more important?
help me correct this essay. Thank a lot
TOPIC: Your school has enough money to purchase either computers for students or books for the library. Which should your school choose to buy - computers or books? Use specific reasons and examples to support your recommendation.
My school currently has enough money to purchase either the computers for students or books for the library. So, my school council is confused between two choices. Some pupils say that this sum of money should be used for books while others think that the school should use this money for computers. In my opinion, I believe that my school should choose to buy computers because of the three following reasons.
For the first reason, the computers have both an enormous resource of free online books and study tools. I am, in fact, lucky because I possess a computer in my room. So, I know how the computers assist efficiently the studying of pupils. When I am going to have an academic topic in class, I like to find out deep details surrounding this topic through Google search engine. So, I always understand and memorize entirely what my teachers mention in class. Therefore, equipping computers is really important to boost the scores of the pupils in my school.
Second, the pupils in my school are lacking a large number of computers to practice the communication science. My classmates usually postpone session about this subject because another class also wants to use this few number of computers. This is disadvantage to poor pupils who only afford to buy books to read. They usually get fewer score of communication science than pupils having computers at home.
Finally, supplying computers for pupils reduces violent during the recreations. My school council weekly punishes the pupils who violate school rules. The number of these cases has reached averagely twelve each weak. I believe that these numbers will drop significantly when pupils use the free time to relax themselves through playing game or listening music on computers.
In summary, equipping computers for pupils is really important since my school is lacking a large number of computers for practicing information science. More importantly, they help pupils improve their grades and reduce the violating state in my school.