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  1. #1
    dsouza is offline Newbie
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    Default Harappa civilization

    Can you please help me with my essay please make changes and try to better my introduction

    The Harappa Civilization is one of the oldest and most complex civilizations of the world.
    It consists of well flourished cities dating back to 2500BCE. However, the civilization did not
    always have sophisticated structures in their cities. They actually have remnants dating back to 6500BCE. Meaning that the Harappa civilizations were not a complex society originally, but made changes in their system to achieve their complexity. Archaeological evidence from recent history of
    the Indus Valley, the Harappa civilization show signs of evolving from settlements into becoming
    Urbanized. The signs include early culture, artistic styles, technologies and social organization
    that each culture differed from the other. Trading between these cultures, induces social and
    cultural changes, causing towns to become more urbanized and later on forming cities.

  2. #2
    chester_100's Avatar
    chester_100 is offline Member
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    Default Re: Harappa civilization

    Hi,
    The blue parts are mine and the red parts should be removed from the sentences. I just left them there for the purpose of comparison. So while reading don’t pay attention to them.

    Quote Originally Posted by dsouza View Post

    Can you please help me with my essay please, making necessary changes and trying to amend my introduction?

    The Harappa Civilization is one of the oldest and most complex civilizations of the world/ of all time/ that the world has ever known.
    It consists of well flourished cities dating back to 2500 BCE B.C/ before Christ.

    However, the civilization did not always have sophisticated structures in their/ the cities. They actually have There are remnants dating back to 6500 BC .Meaning suggesting/ showing that the Harappa civilizations were did not originally establish/ form a complex society social order, but made changes in their system achieved the complexity of their system through evolutionary stages.

    Archaeological evidence (acquired) from recent research history conducted in of the Indus Valley proves/ shows that the Harappa civilization show signs of evolved from settlements into becoming urbanized regions. The signs findings include early/ their primitive culture, artistic styles artifacts, technologies and a code of their social organization that each was different from culture one region to another differed from the other. Trading between among these cultures induces social and
    cultural changes, causing towns to become more urbanized and later on forming turn into cities.
    Good luck


    Chester
    Last edited by chester_100; 12-Nov-2009 at 14:05.

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