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Thread: Education

  1. #1
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    Education

    I have written a small essay on the education and I would be grateful if you would polish it up. Perhaps you will disagree with many statements of the essay but it's your right. Everyone has the right to have their own opinion.

    Nowadays education is one of the most important subjects to discuss. Why is education so important? Why do parents call upon their children to receive a decent education?
    First of all, we should clearly specify what the world demand for highly educated employees is connected with. The chief reason is that technology does not stand still. As a consequence, more and more complex machines are invented. In spite of the fact that manufacturers of these machines constantly assert that they do everything in their power to make their products as labour-saving as possible, most of such attempts are vain. Trying to invent technologies which would allow workers to spend less time doing physical work, they completely forget about whether the products full of their newest technologies will be easy to handle. Implementation of something new often creates a need for workers who have the appropriate qualifications. Therefore, the considerable need for educated people is directly connected with the advent of modern technologies.
    Second, most managers of big companies have begun realizing that the volume of production greatly depends on what kind of people works in their company. The time when only the presidents of the transnational enterprises were aware of the paramount importance of recruiting first-class employees elapsed a long time ago. About 30-40 years ago you could come to a company to apply for a well-paid job having received only some compulsory education. Nowadays, as said above, everyone is eager to get the most skilled employee.
    In summary, the importance of having a decent education has become far greater now than it was 30-40 years ago. The growing need for skilled cadres is dramatic and nearly everyone recognizes it.

  2. #2
    Tdol is offline Editor, UsingEnglish.com
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    Re: Education

    Nowadays education is one of the most important subjects to discuss. Why is education so important? Why do parents call upon their children to receive a decent education?

    I'm not a fan of direct questions in this type of writing. IMO, it would read better if they were rewritten indirectly. Other might feel differently.

    The conclusion:
    The growing need for skilled cadres is dramatic and nearly everyone recognizes it.

    How about changing it a bit:
    It is universally accepted that the demand for skilled staff is growing dramatically.


  3. #3
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    Re: Education

    All right, I thought about the use of direct questions while writing the essay and eventually decided to leave them. Do you like the following changes?
    Nowadays education is one of the most important subjects to discuss. Let us try to find out why education is so important and why parents call upon their children to receive a decent education.

    About the conclusion:
    OK, I'll change it in the way you showed but I'd rather use widely, generally than universally.

    BTW, I managed to find a stylistic mistake in my essay before posting it here. I first wrote: ...crucially depends on what kind of people works... but then opened my English dictionary and discovered that it was a British slang word the use of which, I think, is quite inappropriate in my essay.
    Last edited by Flash; 19-Mar-2005 at 18:40.

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