It is my essay for the topic "Brides". Please check it for me. Honestly, I am not confident on it. I think it still has problem on its structure.
I hope to recieve your comments soon.
"It is said that all women, regardless of culture, age or any standards of beauty,
would['are, should be'. 'Would' makes no sense without a condition.] be elegant ladies on their wedding day. I strongly believe that. Imagine yourself wearing a long white fluttery dress, hand in hand with your man that will be so peacefully romantic. My sister used to tell me that she was deadly happy when falling into my brother in law’s glance on that day. His glance was not reserved for his girlfriend any more; it was for his wife who would enjoy the rest of her life with him. It was more cherish and responsible.
[Do you mean the glance was more cherished because it was more responsible now that they were married?]
At that time, she felt something
freaking[This word doesn't belong. It's a euphemism for "fucking" as an adjective]strange in her heart that told her to stick her lifeto that man and hold thehands for ever. When I looked dubiously on that, she said her feeling is common with other brides and I just canwill only understand if I get married with my Mr. Right. However, on the practical view, we will see many prolixtedious and costly rituals on the wedding day due to Vietnamese culture. It is not only seen as the day of the couple, but also the day for two families to show off. As thea result, the bride will definitely be exhausted at the end of her important day or, in the worse wayat worst , she will be stuck inwith a big debt with her husband. "