correct my sentence / the burn was ....

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mefa

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Joined
Nov 21, 2009
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Student or Learner
The burn was deep and


the shock was very strong on my


mom


Are there any mistakes in this sentence
 

Raymott

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Joined
Jun 29, 2008
Member Type
Academic
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English
Home Country
Australia
Current Location
Australia
The burn was deep and


the shock was very strong on my


mom


Are there any mistakes in this sentence
Which sentence?
 
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