Hope this helpsOriginally Posted by paul jhello there,
..i know there's been a lot of discussion surrounding this issue...i began writing a story, and received some criticism about past and present tense usage ....here's an example...can you please tell me what you think i'm doing wrong, here? ...any help would be greatly appreciated....paul
We lived in a yellow house I liked to say. But it was really an apartment. We lived on the first floor- my mom, my brother and I. My mother struggled. She was able to hold a job, but it never paid well, nor was it ever very pleasant work. I supposed she made the best of it, though. I remember she always had friends coming over, and a few of them even lived with us over the years. She always needed a friend close by. I could tell things wore on my mother. There were times when she couldn’t even get up for work. She was just tired, I suppose. I hated that. And there were times she just wasn’t there, and Ronny and I found ourselves visiting her at a hospital while we lived with the neighbors for a while. But for now, things were good. Things were great. I was ten-years-old, and what could be better?
“What are you doing?”
“I’m getting my bike.”
Ronny and I always kept our bikes in our room. So many bikes had been stolen in the neighborhood our mother insisted we keep them in the house. Not that anyone would really want our bikes, they were junk, really. But our bikes were our real freedom. We used them to get away, and [today ( I think you have to use other key word, all I wanted to do was go.
“Well hurry up!”
Ronny lay past of lay (I don't remember) there staring at me wrapped in his blankets. All I saw was his face. He was bundled up tight because he always slept naked. He had come home early that morning around 5am.
Ronny was four years older than me, and he worked. He had to. He really didn’t have a choice. Ever since our fathers had left so long ago, Ronny had to contribute. And although our mother wanted him to stay in school and do well, the reality was he had to work. We needed his money, nearly always desperately.