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  1. #1
    takiko is offline Newbie
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    Default PLEASE Help me edit, "Advantage of e-commerce"

    This is a cause and effect essay.
    Please help me edit my poor english essay


    Discuss the advantages of e-commerce


    Throughout the past ten years, electronic technology has changed drastically. Having computer and internet is the necessity for people, especially for the business field. E-commerce is defined as a method of buying and selling goods and services processed over the internet. There are three advantages of e commerce which are low cost of doing business, the catalog flexibility, and unlimited market place.


    First of all, e commerce can help the employer builds a low cost business. The e-commerce can reduce the physical store cost. It is because the e commerce do not need a physical store, the employer do not need it to operate the business. The employer only need a e commerce software to run the business. Also the e commerce reduce the cost of employees, because e commerce only need two to three employees to work for data entry or order processing. Compare to physical store, it may required more employees to work for it. It is because they want their customer satisfy, therefore they need more employee to serve the consumers.


    Secondly, the catalog is flexible and it is user friendly for customers. This is because the customers can search items by categories, sub-categories, manufacturer, price or any other specified need. The owner of e commerce can update the E-Catalog anytime, whether it is adding new products, or adjusting prices, without the expense and time of a traditional print catalog. It is much more convenience for the customers to search want they want. Compare to the traditional one, the customers need to find a salesperson to help them to find it. Using a right software, can be easier for the owner to update their catalog.


    Last but not least, the most important for e-commerce is unlimited market place. The internet gives the opportunity to browse and shop at their convenience and at their place. They can access the services from home, office or on the road, twenty-four hours a day, and seven days a week. The internet also allow the business to reach people around the world, offering the goods and services to a global base. They can interact and trade without concerns the about geographic location and time. The owner can expand their target market, not only so offering the business in the local, but also global. The traditional one can sell the service to the global also, but they need the cost to doing it. The e commerce can do the business local and global by using the internet.


    To sum up, the the three main ideas are the advantage for e-commerce. E-commerce bring the convenient to the owner and consumers. The e-commerce will become one of the important role for the future economy.
    Last edited by takiko; 02-Mar-2010 at 22:28.

  2. #2
    RonBee's Avatar
    RonBee is offline Moderator
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    Default Re: Help me edit, "Advantage of e-commerce)

    Try:
    .
    Having computers with Internet access is a necessity for many, especially in the business world.


  3. #3
    takiko is offline Newbie
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    Default Re: Help me edit, "Advantage of e-commerce)

    Is there anythings I need to edit!?
    Because I need to hand in to my teacher,and the % of the final grade is high

    MANY THANKS TO THE ONE WHO HELP ME EDIT THIS ESSAY!!

  4. #4
    Tdol is offline Editor, UsingEnglish.com
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    Default Re: Help me edit, "Advantage of e-commerce)

    Your second paragraph is based on an assumption that the e-commerce is purely digital- if the business is selling physical goods, it may not require a physical store, but it may still require storage, like warehouses. Also, you talk about an unlimited market place, but it is still limited in the sense that not everyone has access to the internet, so these people ae excluded.

  5. #5
    takiko is offline Newbie
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    Default Re: Help me edit, "Advantage of e-commerce)

    Quote Originally Posted by Tdol View Post
    Your second paragraph is based on an assumption that the e-commerce is purely digital- if the business is selling physical goods, it may not require a physical store, but it may still require storage, like warehouses. Also, you talk about an unlimited market place, but it is still limited in the sense that not everyone has access to the internet, so these people ae excluded.
    You mean this two parts,
    Secondly, the catalog is flexible and it is user friendly for customers. This is because the customers can search items by categories, sub-categories, manufacturer, price or any other specified need. The owner of e commerce can update the E-Catalog anytime, whether it is adding new products, or adjusting prices, without the expense and time of a traditional print catalog. It is much more convenience for the customers to search want they want. Compare to the traditional one, the customers need to find a salesperson to help them to find it. Using a right software, can be easier for the owner to update their catalog.


    Last but not least, the most important for e-commerce is unlimited market place. The internet gives the opportunity to browse and shop at their convenience and at their place. They can access the services from home, office or on the road, twenty-four hours a day, and seven days a week. The internet also allow the business to reach people around the world, offering the goods and services to a global base. They can interact and trade without concerns the about geographic location and time. The owner can expand their target market, not only so offering the business in the local, but also global. The traditional one can sell the service to the global also, but they need the cost to doing it. The e commerce can do the business local and global by using the internet.

    what can I do for it?
    do I need to re-write the whole part?

  6. #6
    RonBee's Avatar
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    Default Re: PLEASE Help me edit, "Advantage of e-commerce"

    It needs considerable eidting.

    Quote Originally Posted by takiko View Post




    In the past ten years, electronic technology has changed drastically. Having computers with Internet access is a necessity for many, especially in the business world. E-commerce is defined as a method of buying and selling goods and services processed over the Internet. There are three advantages of e commerce: which are the low cost of doing business, the catalog flexibility, and an unrestricted marketplace.

    Quote Originally Posted by takiko View Post
    First of all, e commerce can help the employer builds a low cost business.
    You need to use a word other than employer.

    Edit the essay, then post the revised text in a separate posting on this thread (discussion).


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