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  1. #1
    puzzledlesann is offline Newbie
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    Default Could you have a look at my essay please? Thanks in advance.

    TASK:
    You have read the text below which is an extract from a magazine article on the declining role in the family of fathers today. You decide to write a letter responding to the points raised and describing a person who, in your opinion, has been an ideal father.
    (300-350 words)


    <<A father is more than a male parent. Fathering a child is easy-being a father is not. Many people say that fathers no longer have a clear role in the family. They spend most time outside the home and never really get to know their children. Without models to follow, how can today' s boys understand the concept of 'being a father'? Are there no real fathers left?>>


    My essay...:


    Dear Sir,

    I am writing in response to your article about the declining role in the family of fathers today. I feel that it was most unfair and that there are many men who fulfil exceptionally their duties as fathers. In fact, I know someone who could be seen as a model parent-my father.

    When I look back on the years I was growing up, I can see my father always taking care of me and my older brother. I remember him preparing my favourite snacks and then us sitting together, talking about my day at school while eating. He would listen my complaints about my school teachers or my friends and he would console me with his words-although only his presence was a great consolation. Moreover, no matter how tired he was he would dedicate much of his time to play or to take a walk with us.

    Even later, when I was an adolescent, my father was the person I trusted most and I turned to him when I faced a dilemma. He was a tolerant father, to whom I would confide my intimate thoughts without the fear of being judged. However, one should not think that my father had plenty of spare time as he has being working hard since I can remember. Thus, having knowledge of the sacrifices he made to raise me and my brother I can only be grateful to him.

    Now, in my early twenties, he still is the most important man in my life and he is the one who provides for my studies. Therefore, I can say that not only has he been a great father, but also a perfect example for every working parent.

    Overall, my father has been a parent whose valuable advice and behavior towards me and my brother is an inspiration to us and a challenge to be equally good parents. It is my firm belief, that there are many other good fathers like him. We can see them everyday walking their children to school or playing with them in the playground.

    Yours faithfully,


    (349 words)
    I could use your help!!!Thanks in advance!
    Last edited by puzzledlesann; 31-Mar-2010 at 12:09.

  2. #2
    puzzledlesann is offline Newbie
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    Default Re: Could you have a look at my essay please? Thanks in advance.

    Gillnetter thank you for correcting my mistakes.
    I really appreciate your help since it is quite obvious how much desperate I am (I've sent 3 essays within a week) !

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