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  1. #1
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    Default can you check some error in essay for me?

    Topic: some people believe that students should be given one long vacation each year. Others believe that students should have several short vacations throughout the year. Which viewpoint do you agree with? Use specific reasons and examples to support your choice.

    All people love vacation especially students. Because it is time for us to stay at home, travel with family or hang out with friends for relaxation. Students can get either long vacation or short-term vacation. Personally, I believe that several short vacations are better than long vacation throughout the year. There are some reasons why I hold my point of view.

    Firstly, several short vacations allow students recharge energy better than student take long vacation. To illustrate this, think of a student have two months to have vacation, he will travel on one months .The rest of days he will come back to prepare for restarting to school. This is not waste a lot of time for preparing to adjust themselves like others who take long vacation. Moreover, students who take short-term vacation are more refreshed and eager to study whereas students who take long vacation are more lethargic and less energy to study.

    Secondly, recollection of knowledge is easier for students who have several short vacations. Because they take short break about one or 2 weeks from school so all old things which they learn in before term are still remembered. While long vacation make students forget old lesson from one or two months ago. Owing to short vacation, students not only remember old lesson but also help to rely on them to understand new lesson easier and remember more deeply.

    Finally, several short vacations allow students to utilize time wisely and do more things. For example, they recognize which subject they are weak, and in short vacation, they will attend to review course. Likewise in the next break time, they use their free time to attend to painting class or music class. This will help them to enhance their knowledge significantly. Furthermore, they also do more things such as hanging out with their friends, visit relatives, help father repaint or repair fence.

    To sum up, although taking a long vacation may sound more fun, for reason above, there is no doubt in my mind that having several short vacation is better for students than having long vacation throughout the year. Students able to recharge energy and rest between two semester, remember old lesson easily .In addition, they can utilize time wisely and do more things.
    Last edited by nice_bear; 03-Apr-2010 at 00:52. Reason: i want to increase the seize of words

  2. #2
    dungdinh2002 is offline Newbie
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    Default Re: can you check some error in essay for me?

    ....between two SEMESTERS

    ....While long vacation MAKES students forget old lesson from one or two months ago.

    ...having several short VACATIONS

  3. #3
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    Default Re: can you check some error in essay for me?

    oh,thank you very much

  4. #4
    IHIVG's Avatar
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    Default Re: can you check some error in essay for me?

    A couple of other suggestions:
    Quote Originally Posted by nice_bear View Post
    All people love vacation, especially students. Because it is time for us to stay at home, travel with family or hang out with friends for relaxation. Students can get either long vacation or short-term vacation. Personally, I believe that several short vacations are better than the long vacation throughout the year. There are some reasons why I hold my point of view.
    Firstly, several short vacations allow students to recharge energy better than student take the long vacation. To illustrate this, think of a student who have has a two-months' to have vacation. He will travel on for one months; the rest of days he will come back to spend preparing for restarting to school. This is not a waste of a lot of time for preparing to adjust themselves like others who take long vacation. (I don’t understand this sentence) Moreover, the students who take a short-term vacation are more refreshed and eager to study, whereas the students who take a long vacation are more lethargic and have less energy to study.
    Secondly, recollection of knowledge is easier for the students who have several short vacations. Because they take a short break about one or 2 weeks from school, so all the old things which they had learned in before term, are still remembered, while the long vacation makes students forget old lessons from one or two months ago. Owing to short vacation, students not only remember old lessons, but also help to rely on them to understand new lessons easier and remember more deeply.
    Finally, several short vacations allow students to utilize time wisely and do more things. For example, they recognize which subject they are weak in, and in during the short vacation, they will attend to review the course. Likewise, in the next break time, they can/will use their free time to attend to painting class or music class painting or music classes. This will help them to enhance their knowledge significantly. Furthermore, they also do more things such as hanging out with their friends, visiting relatives, helping their fathers repaint or repair fence. (to do some repairs)
    To sum up, although taking a long vacation may sound more fun, for the reason above, there is no doubt in my mind that having several short vacations is better for students than having long vacation throughout the year. Students are able to recharge energy and rest between two semesters, remember old lessons easily. In addition, they can utilize time wisely and do more things.

  5. #5
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    Default Re: can you check some error in essay for me?

    oh, thank you so much!
    But I do not still understand the error that you check for me, has a two-months vacation or a two-month vacation?
    And
    "This is not a waste of time for preparing to adjust themselves like others who take long vacation"--> i thinks i translate it from Vietnamese to English, so having wrong meaning. that sentence means that students who take short vacation waste fewer time adjust themselves suitable for next semester than others take long vacation.

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    Default Re: can you check some error in essay for me?

    Quote Originally Posted by nice_bear View Post
    oh, thank you so much!
    But I do not still understand the error that you check for me, has a two-months vacation or a two-month vacation?
    It's two-months', as I originally stated (note apostrophe). Check this link (at the bottom of the page):
    http://www.grammarmudge.cityslide.co...26348/4944.htm
    Also, one could argue about hyphen but I think it's optional here.

    And
    "This is not a waste of time for preparing to adjust themselves like others who take long vacation"--> i thinks i translate it from Vietnamese to English, so having wrong meaning. that sentence means that
    Students who take short vacation waste fewer time adjust themselves suitable for next semester than others take long vacation.
    Students who take a short vacation waste less time adjusting themselves for the next semester than others who take a long vacation.
    But I'm still not sure whether 'adjust themselves' is fine in this context. Perhaps someone else could clarify.

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