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  1. #1
    vane.jensen is offline Newbie
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    Talking I need help with application letter

    hi!
    can somebody help me with my application letter, i'm trying to go to the staes to acience camp and i don't know if what i wrote it is ok.

    in the letter i have to write my abilities ans reasons to go...
    this is the letter, please help me to correct it


    To the Embassy of the United States
    Dear Sirs:
    It is a great pleasure to write to you and at first I introduce myself.
    I am Vanessa Jensen. I study at San Agustín school in Antofagasta. I want to go to the National Youth Science Camp because I think that is a great opportunity to learn about interesting things such as astronomy, chemical, physics, math and others things about science, from other students from other countries. I think that it is a great idea to make a camp about science, because I want to study astronomy, so I would like to learn more things about that and about physics.
    I am a good student. I have a mark 6.8. I am participating in the national math championship, and the last year I won a bronze medal. Also, the last year I won a gold medal in the regional math Olympics.
    When I was studying in the basic school, I was selected to participate in a special course called DeLTA in the Catholic University of the North, and I got success in many subjects, like architecture. In that subject I won a special prize as the best student of the class and for that reason I got a gold medal.
    When I finished the primary school, I received a special prize for been the best student, because I obtained marks 7.0.
    Well those are the reasons because of I want to go to the NYSC. …

    regards
    Vanessa Jensen

  2. #2
    vane.jensen is offline Newbie
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    Talking Re: I need help with application letter

    thank a lot.
    i'm going to do some adjustments.
    would bother you if a send you my new corrected letter and you check it again?

    thanks before hand

    Vanessa

  3. #3
    vane.jensen is offline Newbie
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    Default Re: I need help with application letter

    Dear Gillnetter
    Here I have my new letter, I hope you can continue halping me.

    thanks

    To the Embassy of the United States

    Dear Sirs:


    It is a great pleasure to write to you. I would like to introduce myself. I am Vanessa Jensen. I study at San Agustín School in Antofagasta, Chile.
    I am a good student. I have 6.8 as grade of proficiency at school. I am participating in the National Math Championship and last year I won the national bronze medal. Also, last year I won a gold medal in the regional Math Olympics.

    Regarding academic competences, when I was studying in primary school, I was selected to participate in a special program called DeLTA in the North Catholic University, and I was successful in many subjects including architecture; in that subject I won a special prize as the best student of the class and for that reason I got a gold medal. When I finished primary school, I also received a special prize for being the best student because I obtained 7.0 as final grade.

    I want to go to the National Youth Science Camp because I want to study Astronomy so it would be a great opportunity to learn more this matter, I also think that is a great opportunity to learn not only about interesting topics such as Astronomy, Chemistry, Physics, Math and others science subjects but also about different cultures and traditions from other students of other countries. I think that it is a great idea to have a science camp to improve and motivate young people to have collaborative work, to create bonds that will help us to work in the future; this is an important issue to the mankind.

    Thank you for considering my application and I look forward to attending this exciting camp.

    Regards
    Vanessa Jensen

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