new sentences

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Atchan

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I want to improve my english skills so put he some sentences so help me by correcting them. thanx:-D


1- Peter was intending to go to France but when he heard about the volcanic smoke that happened in Greece last few weeks he abolished his travel to France and stayed with his friends cause some of them leaved the country.

2- Tom is going with his friends to a special entertainment center so I told him to be cautious and aware that he is an adult not a kid and avoid every harmful thing.

3- Our labor ordered from us to increase his fee because he got married and his parents were sick so he needed to get enough money to put them the hospital.
 

Raymott

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I want to improve my english skills so put he some sentences so help me by correcting them. thanx:-D


1- Peter was intending to go to France but when he heard about the volcanic smoke that happened in Greece in the last few weeks, he [STRIKE]abolished[/STRIKE] cancelled his plans. Instead, he stayed with his friends, because some of them [STRIKE]leaved[/STRIKE] left the country.
I don't understand what you mean by him staying with some friends because they left the country. Do you mean he decided to travel elsewhere, where his friends were?
"cause" is not the right word. You want "because". Don't be fooled by all the cute spellings - coz, cause, cuz, etc. The word is "because".

2- Tom is going with his friends to a special entertainment center, so I told him to be cautious and aware that he is an adult, not a kid, and to avoid every harmful thing.

3- Our laborer [STRIKE]ordered[/STRIKE] requested [STRIKE]from [/STRIKE] us to increase his fee because he got married and his parents were sick. He needed to get enough money to put his parents in hospital.

In general, your sentences are longer than they should be. You are adding too many new clauses with "and" that would better as new sentences.
And you need to try using commas.
 

emsr2d2

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This should also have been posted in the "Ask a Teacher" section, not the "Teaching English" which is meant to be for teachers to talk to each other!
 

Atchan

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in the first question I know that I've exaggerated in the sentence, so I will utilize from your advices.

I want to ask you some questions?
1) does "abolish" has the meaning of "cancel" so why you wiped it.
2) does the word "order" and "request" don't need to add "from" behind them.

eventually, I know that English is hard to me so help me as much as you can.

thanks
 

Raymott

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in the first question I know that I've exaggerated in the sentence, so I will utilize from your advices.

I want to ask you some questions?
1) does "abolish" has the meaning of "cancel" so why you wiped it.
2) does the word "order" and "request" don't need to add "from" behind them.

eventually, I know that English is hard to me so help me as much as you can.

thanks
"Abolish" is used when some ongoing policy or law, etc. is officially nullified. "Cancel" is the right word for reversing everyday plans and decisions.

'Order' and 'request' only use prepositions when there is a need for a prepositional phrase.
The labourer requested a pay rise.
The labourer requested a pay rise from us.
The labourer requested us to increase his fee.
The labourer requested from us an increase in his fee.
But not:
The labourer requested [STRIKE]from[/STRIKE] us to increase his fee.
 

Atchan

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Thank you for your help and explanation. I will keeping on, trust me

best regards
 
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