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  1. #1
    KaramSoft is offline Newbie
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    Default Please proofread my essay

    Please proof read my essay,
    the question is: the theme for Macbeth might be "absolute power corrupts absolutely" prove that using evidence from the play and from general life.
    I'm in Grade 11, Thanks
    please correct and rewrite any phrase or misspelling

    Absolute Power Corrupts Absolutely
    Is it true that great men are almost always bad men? Power could be given to any person but not anyone could control using his/her power rather than abuse using it. Although those leaders might have done some good for their countries, this was still a result of them abusing their power. It hid all the good works from the minds of their people. Saddam Hussein, for example, was Iraq’s president and dictator. Even though he helped Iraq’s economy to grow and also funded public education. However, his aggressiveness and crimes hid all of his great achievements. Even though he regret for making them now, but crying after killing your victim by your own hands won’t help you. So power tends to corrupt, but absolute power corrupts absolutely. Great men are almost always bad men.
    Although, George Orwell’s character “Napoleon” made the plans to build the windmill, he used his power for his own advantages at the same time. In the story, George was representing Napoleon as Stalin, the Russian Soviet Union leader. That was viewed as the authoritarian of Russia because he used, just like Napoleon, terror and violence to control his people. Unfortunately Napoleon did the same, as he used executions when he first became the leader of the Animal Farm, not because he was scared by his own people but because he did not trust them. Therefore he killed every animal that helped Snowball, the leader that Napoleon replaced. Nevertheless, it is clear to the average mind that Napoleon did not change the seven commandments for the benefit of the animal on the Animal Farm, but he changed them to fit his own personal gain. In fact, half of the animals in the Animal Farm could not read their names, so how would they be able to read the new rules? But all of the animals thought that “Napoleon is always right” (Orwell), ignoring the fact that he might be using them for his own individualized advantages. Although, he proposed the plans for making the windmill but even if he made them by himself, it was only to keep the animals busy. This way he would be able to do whatever he wanted without interference from the animals. In the end Napoleon changed from the pig that the animals respected to their enemy. “The creatures outside looked from pig to man, and from man to pig, and from pig to man again; but already it was impossible to say which was which." (Orwell). Napoleon was a creature similar to man. Napoleon became a corrupt individual because he abused his power, Napoleon is similar to Stalin of the Russian Revolution. Both leaders tried to help and raise the economy of their societies, but they both failed to control their own behaviour because they misused their power.
    On the other hand, Macbeth, Shakespeare’s character, followed his vaulting ambition to be a king. However, the witches that gave him the power that made him the king; and in the end they took the power back from him. When Macbeth was just Thane of Cawdor, the character that was so kind, he would not even think of murdering even a fly! just like Lady Macbeth described him” It is too full o’ the milk of human kindness” (I. v. 16) , here she described her husband as having too much kindness. That he could never think of killing anyone. Moreover, following his vaulting ambition and the three witches evilness thoughts he did the deed by himself. Even though Lady Macbeth told him “A little water clears us of this deed” (II. ii. 85). he can’t ignore his guilt conscience and since the murder of the king. His power hungriness increased and increased which he couldn’t feed only with more murder and blood. Therefore, he kills his best friend Banquo, thinking that he might or his offspring, as the prophecy aforementioned, will take his power. But his soul can’t stop his innocence conscience, so he saw Banquo’s ghost in his chair in the banquet and he can’t sleep anymore and all of the conscience punishments. Finally, he regret for his life and the murders that he has done. This is the moment when the character’s power weaken and starts to decay, “Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player/ that struts and frets his hour upon the stag”(V. v. 26-28) Macbeth is saying, as from his eye view, that life is nothing since the character only acts a minute and so then it’s done. In brief, the witches gave Macbeth the confidence to kill Duncan and be the king, but at the same time, they gave him false security, false confidence, to take back the power from him.
    Finally, Saddam Hussein, Iraq “dictator” as viewed by the West tarred and feathered everyone who stood on his way, but ended up hanged by the same people who showed him loyalty. Unfortunately, Saddam Hussein was the president who I lived under his power for fifteen years. Although, I was a small child and politics didn’t mean anything to me, but I was able to recognize and fell the power and the luxury that he and his mates and followers were enjoying, on the other hand, other citizens were demanding and suffering from medical care. He didn’t appreciate or respected the high professions in the country. In addition to that, the doctor was getting paid six dollars per month, and it wasn’t even enough for food of that month! Whereas, the solider gets way more than that. Going back to his childhood, his father died just before his birth and his mother married to a step father. Psychologically, that changed his thinking, and it was probably the reason why he was aggressive to his neighbours (according to Britannica) as he didn’t trust anyone, even his son Auday as Saddam asked him to have his own forces and guards different than Saddam one’s. Saddam helped Iraq economy to rise up and improved public education and supported it. He also decreased the people who were illiterate by funding the schools which teach them. At the same time, he used terror and violence against his people to control them. And according to John Kennedy “Ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country” Saddam did what is possible for him to do for his people but also waited for what they would do to protect him at the time of war.He had several crimes, for example: chemical weapons against Kurds in 1989, Invasion of the Kuwait in 1990. Although, Saddam controlled Iraq’s economy and improved education but his behaviour and power hungriness corrupted easily in minutes, and his power and Pa’ath party, which he belonged to, corrupted absolutely.
    Therefore, power of the great men corrupts absolutely because they always abuse using it. The abuse of the power by a leader is, for sure, will have a great prejudice on the people that are controlled by that leader, and even if those leaders were a “Great men” as they used to be gentlemen and also helped their society/country to stand along the good ones, but they are always use their power for their own advantages as the power change them. Lets imagine a world without power that actually corrupts; it will of course, be a world filled up with wars that never end and people that will be nothing than slaves to their leaders who never die! We all wish that all the absolute power that is not for the good of the people to corrupt, so there would be no dictators.

  2. #2
    KaramSoft is offline Newbie
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    Default Re: Please proofread my essay

    I proofread my work and fixed some errors but still I think there is more errors, please check it for me, and comment!!!!!!


    Absolute Power Corrupts Absolutely
    Is it true that great men are almost always bad men? Power could be given to any person but not anyone could control using his/her power rather than abuse using it. Although those leaders might have done some good for their countries, this was still a result of them abusing their power. It hid all the good works from the minds of their people. Saddam Hussein, for example, was Iraq’s president and dictator. Even though he helped Iraq’s economy to grow and also funded public education. However, his aggressiveness and crimes hid all of his great achievements. Even though he regret for making them now, but crying after killing your victim by your own hands won’t help you. So power tends to corrupt, but absolute power corrupts absolutely. Great men are almost always bad men.
    Although, George Orwell’s character “Napoleon” made the plans to build the windmill, he used his power for his own advantages at the same time. In the story, George was representing Napoleon as Stalin, the Russian Soviet Union leader. That was viewed as the authoritarian of Russia because he used, just like Napoleon, terror and violence to control his people. Unfortunately Napoleon did the same, as he used executions when he first became the leader of the Animal Farm, not because he was scared by his own people but because he did not trust them. Therefore he killed every animal that helped Snowball, the leader that Napoleon replaced. Nevertheless, it is clear to the average mind that Napoleon did not change the seven commandments for the benefit of the animal on the Animal Farm, but he changed them to fit his own personal gain. In fact, half of the animals in the Animal Farm could not read their names, so how would they be able to read the new rules? But all of the animals thought that “Napoleon is always right” (Orwell), ignoring the fact that he might be using them for his own individualized advantages. Although, he proposed the plans for making the windmill but even if he made them by himself, it was only to keep the animals busy. This way he would be able to do whatever he wanted without interference from the animals. In the end Napoleon changed from the pig that the animals respected to their enemy. “The creatures outside looked from pig to man, and from man to pig, and from pig to man again; but already it was impossible to say which was which." (Orwell). Napoleon was a creature similar to man. Napoleon became a corrupt individual because he abused his power, Napoleon is similar to Stalin of the Russian Revolution. Both leaders tried to help and raise the economy of their societies, but they both failed to control their own behaviour because they misused their power.
    On the other hand, Macbeth, Shakespeare’s character, followed his vaulting ambition to be a king. However, the witches that gave him the power that made him the king; and in the end they took the power back from him. When Macbeth was just Thane of Cawdor, the character that was so kind, he would not even think of murdering even a fly! Just like Lady Macbeth described him” It is too full o’ the milk of human kindness” (I. v. 16) , here she described her husband as having too much kindness. That he could never think of killing anyone. Moreover, following his vaulting ambition and the three witches evilness thoughts he did the deed by himself. Even though Lady Macbeth told him “A little water clears us of this deed” (II. ii. 85). He cannot ignore his guilt conscience and since the murder of the king. His power hungriness increased and increased which he could not feed only with more murder and blood. Therefore, he kills his best friend Banquo, thinking that he might or one of his offspring, as the prophecy aforementioned, will take his power. But his soul cannot stop his innocence conscience, so he saw Banquo’s ghost in his chair in the banquet and he cannot sleep anymore and all of the conscience punishments. Finally, he regret for his life and the murders that he has done. This is the moment when the character’s power weaken and starts to decay, “Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player/ that struts and frets his hour upon the stag”(V. v. 26-28) Macbeth is saying, as from his eye view, that life is nothing since the character only acts a minute and then the character is done, what a short life!. In brief, the witches gave Macbeth the confidence to kill Duncan and so Macbeth would a chance to be the king, but at the same time, they gave him false security, false confidence, to take the power back from him.
    Finally, Saddam Hussein, Iraq “dictator” as viewed by the West tarred and feathered everyone who stood on his way, but ended up hanged by the same people who showed him loyalty. Unfortunately, Saddam Hussein was the president who I lived under his power for fifteen years. Although, I was a small child and politics didn’t mean anything to me, but I was able to recognize and fell the power and the luxury that he and his mates and followers were enjoying. On the other hand, other citizens were demanding and suffering from medical care. He did not appreciate or respected the high professions in the country. In addition to that, the doctor was getting paid six dollars per month, and it was not even enough for covering the cost of food of that month! Were the solider got paid way more than that. Going back to his childhood, his father died just before his birth and his mother married to a step father. Psychologically, that changed his thinking, and it was probably the reason why he was aggressive to his neighbours (according to Britannica) as he did not trust anyone, even his son Auday as Saddam asked him to have his own forces and guards different than Saddam one’s. Saddam helped Iraq economy to rise up and improved public education and supported it. He also decreased the people who were illiterate by funding the schools which teach them. At the same time, he used terror and violence against his people to control them. And according to John Kennedy “Ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country” Saddam did what is possible for him to do for his people but also waited for what they would do to protect him at the time of war.He had several crimes, for example, chemical weapons against Kurds in 1989, Invasion of the Kuwait in 1990. Although, Saddam controlled Iraq’s economy and improved education, but his behaviour and power hungriness corrupted easily. And his power and Pa’ath party, which he belonged to, corrupted absolutely.
    Therefore, power of the great men corrupts absolutely because they always abuse using it. The abuse of the power by a leader is, for sure, will have a great prejudice on the people that are controlled by that leader, and even if those leaders were a “Great men” as they used to be gentlemen and also helped their society/country to stand along the good ones, but they always use their power for their own advantages as the power change them. Lets imagine a world without power that actually corrupts; it will of course, be a world filled up with wars that never end and people that will be nothing than slaves to their leader who never die or decay! We all wish that all the absolute power that is not for the good of the people to corrupt, so there would be no dictators.

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