How does this short story sound?

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krazykitty

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May 22, 2010
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Student or Learner
Does it make any sense? Is it stupid. Be honest. Thank you! Hello! How are we all on this lovely day? As you already know. I am starting a NEW blog! How exciting is that! For now is looks a lot similar to my first blog. But not for long. :p
So, here goes my first blogger entry. EEEK!


"Okay, okay! I'll be up in just a second." Reluctantly said Ariane.
Hmmm, What's this? Ariane wondered. NO! NO! I can't believe it. This is the letter my mother always hid from me. Kind of funny that it would be just lying around right here.
I use to ask her about, you know, if she would just tell me a bit about I'd be content. Little does she know the more she hides it from the more the curiosity builds up inside of me. Don't get me wrong she's not mean about it. She'd just tell me there was no need to know. Actually, you'll find this funny! I remember word-for-word was she would say to me, and this is what she'd say. "Honey, there's no reason to stress over it, that was a different world, plus you wouldn't even understand."
I do remember her telling me that there use to be life down below I think he called it E.A.R.T.H. Don't think for one minute I believed her. Hah, it was like saying there's life on mars. Wait, let me think of another way to say that. Because I actually do believe there's life on mars. Got it! That would be like saying there's life inside a grain of rice.
Anyhow, I (obviously) knew she was hiding something from me. And now I can not believe I, Ariane am going to find out what this something is. I really shouldn't but you know the old saying, "Curiosity killed the cat"...
 

emsr2d2

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Staff member
Joined
Jul 28, 2009
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
British English
Home Country
UK
Current Location
UK
Does it make any sense? Is it stupid? Be honest. Thank you! Hello! How are we all on this lovely day? As you already know, I am starting a NEW blog! How exciting is that?! For now, [STRIKE]is [/STRIKE] it looks [STRIKE]a lot[/STRIKE] very similar to my first blog. But not for long. :p
So, here goes my first blog[STRIKE]ger[/STRIKE] entry. EEEK!


"Okay, okay! I'll be up in just a second", [STRIKE]Reluctantly[/STRIKE] said Ariane, reluctantly.
Hmmm, what's this? Ariane wondered. NO! NO! I can't believe it. This is the letter my mother always hid from me. Kind of funny that it would be just lying around right here.
I used to ask her about it, you know, if she would just tell me a bit about it, I'd be content. Little does she know, the more she hides it from me, the more the curiosity builds up inside [STRIKE]of[/STRIKE] me. Don't get me wrong - she's not mean about it. She'd just tell me there was no need to know. Actually, you'll find this funny! I remember word-for-word what[STRIKE]was[/STRIKE] she would say to me, and this is what she'd say. "Honey, there's no reason to stress over it, that was a different world, plus you wouldn't even understand."
I do remember her telling me that there used to be life down below. I think she called it E.A.R.T.H. Don't think for one minute I believed her. Hah, it was like saying there's life on Mars. Wait, let me think of another way to say that because I actually do believe there's life on Mars. Got it! That would be like saying there's life inside a grain of rice.
Anyhow, I (obviously) knew she was hiding something from me. And now I [STRIKE]can not[/STRIKE] cannot believe it - I'm going to find out what this something is. I really shouldn't but you know the old saying, "Curiosity killed the cat"...

See amendments above. I think it's good, and interesting. I'm intrigued. This sounds like a science fiction story though, not an average blog!
 
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