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Thread: Help

  1. #1
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    Could anyone help me to revise this paragraph

    On April 30 1975, South Vietnam was taken over by the Communists from the North after a relentless war that lasted for more than thirty years. Many people who worked for the South Vietnamese government were put into prisons which they called the concentration camp. They had to worked under the brutal condition, with little food .Some of them were beaten and starved to death, and the others who survived, released and be accepted to come to US under an Redress Act called “ODP“from US government . Everything changed dramatically. Life became miserable because we had no freedom in religion and in any activities
    Last edited by princeton; 05-Jun-2010 at 16:04.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Help

    Quote Originally Posted by princeton View Post
    Could anyone help me to revise this paragraph

    On April 30 1975, South Vietnam was taken over by the Communists from the North after a relentless war that lasted for more than thirty years. Many people who worked for the South Vietnamese government were put into prisons were called the concentration camps. They were forced to work under brutal conditions and were given little food.


    Quote Originally Posted by princeton View Post
    Some of them were beaten and starved to death, and the others who survived, released and be accepted to come to US under an Redress Act called “ODP“from US government . Everything changed dramatically. Life became miserable because we had no freedom in religion and in any activities

    Some of them were beaten and starved to death. Those who survived and were released from the concentration camps were allowed to emigrate to the US based on a Redress Act called "ODP" (US law).

    In the concentration camps everything changed dramatically. Life was miserable because we had no freedom of religion nor any other freedoms.

    (You might want to move those last two sentences somewhere else.)



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