Results 1 to 4 of 4
  1. #1
    vectra's Avatar
    vectra is offline Member
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • English Teacher
      • Native Language:
      • Russian
      • Home Country:
      • Ukraine
      • Current Location:
      • Ukraine
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    278
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default is this summary ok?

    The first article, written by Sarah E. Needleman and published in The Wall Street Journal, reflects results of studies, conducted by Bain & Co. and Catalyst Inc. companies concerning job chances that men and women have.
    According to the first research, men mostly believe that they have equal opportunities and possibilities concerning careers with women, while the more than a half of the latter think that men have a big and unfair advantage. The second research shows that it is, in fact, even bigger than women think. The overwhelming majority of executive and board positions belong to men.
    Moreover, women are most often assigned to roles which do not require decision-making, planning and developing strategies. Men are usually the ones who determine companies’ current and future activities.
    The article is concluded with the suggestion that this difference can be achieved by more thorough researching of women’s skills and abilities, thus finding the position for them that suits the most.
    The second article, written by Diana Middleton and published also in The Wall Street Journal, shows that women, despite having the same degree as men, tend to receive smaller payments and achieve then they. Furthermore, men’s salary tends to grow faster.
    However, it appears to be so only for those starting their careers from lower levels. Women that begin with mid-level or senior executive ranks usually have the same career progress as men starting with the same positions. The problem is only that women usually do start from lower ranks in the company, often lower than men.
    Professor Ann Bartel believes that the problem is hidden within inevitable association of women with giving birth. From one point of view, bosses expect that women at some point in the future are going to need some time for babysitting, and therefore are not that eager to promote them to positions which require commitment and large amounts of time. On the other hand, women know it themselves too, and subtly do not wish to be promoted to such positions.
    The only way to resolve the problem, as seen by Professor Bartel, is by redesigning jobs within the company to be more time-flexible and possible to be done from home.

  2. #2
    Raymott's Avatar
    Raymott is offline VIP Member
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Academic
      • Native Language:
      • English
      • Home Country:
      • Australia
      • Current Location:
      • Australia
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Posts
    19,663
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Re: is this summary ok?

    Quote Originally Posted by vectra View Post
    The first article, written by Sarah E. Needleman and published in The Wall Street Journal, reflects results of studies, conducted by Bain & Co. and Catalyst Inc. companies concerning job chances that men and women have.
    According to the first research study, men mostly believe that they have equal career opportunities and possibilities concerning careers with to women, [equal to women] while the more than a half of the latter women think that men have a big huge and unfair advantage. The second research study shows that it the disparity is, in fact, even bigger larger than women think. The overwhelming majority of executive and board positions belong to men.
    [A piece of research is generally referred to as a 'study'. We don't use 'research' as a countable noun. Researchers do research. You can refer to their research, but generally not to their 'researches'. ]
    Big, bigger, etc. are rather informal. You can generally use 'large' instead, as well as 'huge', 'sizable', 'substantial' and others.

    Moreover, women are most often assigned to roles which do not require decision-making, planning and or developing strategies. Men are usually the ones who determine companies’ current and future activities.
    The article is concludes with the suggestion that this difference can be achieved by more thorough researching of women’s skills and abilities, thus finding the position for them that suits the most.
    [I'm not sure what you are saying here. The difference in job roles can be achieved by more research?]

    The second article, written by Diana Middleton and also published in The Wall Street Journal, shows that women, despite having the same degree education as men, tend to receive smaller payments. and achieve then they. [have fewer achievements?] Furthermore, men’s salary tends to grow faster.
    However, it appears to be so only for those starting their careers from lower levels. Women that who begin with at mid-level or senior executive ranks usually have the same career progress as men starting with the same positions. The problem, however, is only that women usually do start from lower ranks in the company, often lower than men. [The topic is pretty clear by now]
    Professor Ann Bartel believes that the problem is hidden within the inevitable association of women with giving birth. From one point of view, bosses expect that women at some point in the future are going to need some time for babysitting, and therefore are [ambiguous subject - bosses or women?] not that eager to promote them to positions which require commitment and large amounts of time. On the other hand, women know it themselves too, and subtly do not wish to be promoted to such positions.
    The only way to resolve the problem, as seen by Professor Bartel, is by redesigning jobs within the company to be more time-flexible and possible able to be done from home.
    Excellent. My suggestions are mainly to make it more colloquial. They don't necessarily imply that what you've written is wrong.

  3. #3
    vectra's Avatar
    vectra is offline Member
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • English Teacher
      • Native Language:
      • Russian
      • Home Country:
      • Ukraine
      • Current Location:
      • Ukraine
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    278
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Re: is this summary ok?

    Thank you for your prompt reply. It is very important for me. Just getting to grips with summary writing.

  4. #4
    vectra's Avatar
    vectra is offline Member
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • English Teacher
      • Native Language:
      • Russian
      • Home Country:
      • Ukraine
      • Current Location:
      • Ukraine
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    278
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Re: is this summary ok?

    Thank you very much indeed!

Similar Threads

  1. [Essay] Summary
    By Topsanna in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 23-Nov-2008, 21:55
  2. Summary
    By SimonUnthan in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 13-Aug-2008, 19:57
  3. help help help need to summary
    By loya2001 in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 16
    Last Post: 22-Dec-2006, 05:33
  4. summary
    By adullstudent in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 19-Oct-2006, 08:00
  5. Summary
    By dean in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 04-Aug-2006, 11:45

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •