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  1. new2grammar's Avatar
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Student or Learner
      • Native Language:
      • Punjabi
      • Home Country:
      • India
      • Current Location:
      • India

    • Join Date: May 2008
    • Posts: 880
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    #1

    plaese check the letter

    Dear patron,

    At the outset, we would like to thank you for your continues support to make Dwarkadas jeweler achieve its peaks of success

    It gives us immense pleasure to announce that Dwarkadas Chandumal Jewellers is participating at the India International Jewellery Show (IIJS), Indiaís biggest jewellery show. We are Pleased to invite you to a rare show of our new range of Jewellery that we would be launching at the event with an exclusive fashion show - an exclusive preview for our loyal patron, thatís you.



    As we have limited number of seats. Hence, we request you to confirm your participation at earliest, so we can book a seat for you.

  2. 2010's Avatar
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Interested in Language
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      • English
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      • India
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      • India

    • Join Date: May 2010
    • Posts: 373
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    #2

    Re: plaese check the letter

    Quote Originally Posted by new2grammar View Post
    Dear pPatron,

    At the outset, we would like to thank you for your continues continuous support to make Dwarkadas jeweler achieve its peaks of success.

    It gives us immense pleasure to announce that Dwarkadas Chandumal Jewellers is participating at the India (India or Indian - double check) International Jewellery Show (IIJS), Indiaís biggest jewellery show. We are Ppleased to invite you to a rare show of our new range of Jewellery that we would will be launching at the event with an exclusive fashion show - an exclusive preview for our loyal pPatron, thatís you.



    As we have limited number of seats. Hence, we request you to confirm your participation at the earliest, so we can book a seat for you.
    ===Not a teacher===

    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Interested in Language
      • Native Language:
      • Chinese
      • Home Country:
      • Malaysia
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      • Malaysia

    • Join Date: Jun 2006
    • Posts: 2,130
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    #3

    Re: plaese check the letter

    I have two comments to add:

    'At the outset' is not appropriate, 'first of all' is preferred.

    Dwarkadas Chandumal Jewellers is participating at the India International Jewellery Show.
    You participate 'in an event' not 'at an event'.


    not a teacher

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