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  1. #1
    salem Guest

    Do you agree with this idea...?

    Postmodern and Electronic Tyrant Readers

    Writing and participating in posting threads and posts in the electronic hyperspace forums has become widespread and much discussed phenomena, though engaging in such writings, it does not go without some prizes we as writers have to pay, for instance, we have to bear the consequence of how our writings are going to be manipulated and interpreted by readers according to their own limited schema, since we are trying to reach the satisfaction of our vast worldwide audiences, yet have different cultural as well as vary backgrounds knowledge. In that, I would tell you frankly that it is not only a very tough task a person can ever get himself into, but the most troublesome business.

    Spooner in this regard stated that, "maybe we should acknowledge that in the postmodern age, the reader, not the writer, is the real tyrant: multi-tasking, channel-surfing, capricious and fickle, free to interpret, misread, manipulate, and (horrors) apply. We're all guilty; we start at the end, in the middle, we don't finish, we joyously juxtapose bits of what we read with other readings, other experiences. But the point is that this is our most natural process. Both reader and writer are engaged constantly in making knowledge from a very random world'. (274)



    Can our words be perceived the way they meant for? No one can guarantee you this, since each individual automatically internalizes information and places them in different categories in his/her mind in which it is hard for you to know where each single person placed the desired information that goes with what you really approach...Moreover some readers have no storages or categories for certain information, because they have no MONITOR for it ( when you have a monitor it means that you are not selective in your reading, in fact, you try to read and comprehend to gain more knowledge about any information your eyes caught) this can be because such readers (with no monitor) automatically delete such information in which their long and working memories are standstill empty of such information...So those who unfortunately lack these monitors, will very often misunderstand (disabuse) the point of the messages that embedded in writings.

    Do you agree with this information :mad:

    Since I am new here, I would like to know whether if this kind of information will be of any use to you, or you think you have certain rules in which we must follow :D ?

    Best wishes and love



    Salem

  2. #2
    RonBee's Avatar
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    Well, you posted that in the right place. (General Language Discussions.) Are those your words? Since you don't ask for a critique, I won't offer you one. It is not information but someone's opinion, and the writing needs work.

    For the forum rules click on Rules. (It isn't working right now, but hopefully it soon will be.) Mostly, we just expect you to be civil. :)

    I had no idea I had a worldwide audience. :wink:

    Welcome to our forum.

    :D

  3. #3
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  4. #4
    salem Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by RonBee
    This is my words, infact, I would like to practice my writing and improve it so I wouldn't mind if you correct it.

    Thank you for your help

    best wishes and love
    salem

  5. #5
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    Re: Do you agree with this idea...?

    Simpler is usually better. Let's start with the title.

    • Postmodern and Electronic Tyrant Readers


    What is your essay about? Internet forums, right? I suggest changing the title to something the reader will be able to understand more easily.

    First paragraph.

    • Writing and participating in posting threads and posts in the electronic hyperspace forums has become widespread and much discussed phenomena,


    Internet forums have become widespread and much-discussed phenomena.

    • though engaging in such writings, it does not go without some prizes we as writers have to pay, for instance, we have to bear the consequence of how our writings are going to be manipulated and interpreted by readers according to their own limited schema, since we are trying to reach the satisfaction of our vast worldwide audiences, yet have different cultural as well as vary backgrounds knowledge.


    It is difficult for me to know what the writer is trying to say. I suggest that you rewrite that using simpler language. I am not at all sure what "it does not go without some prizes" means. I'm not sure how schema fits there, but that is not a word I am familiar with anyhow. I don't think satisfaction fits at all. Certainly, in these cyber communities people of varied cultural backgrounds talk to and learn from each other when otherwise they would have never met.

    You need to work on those run-on sentences.

    • In that, I would tell you frankly that it is not only a very tough task a person can ever get himself into, but the most troublesome business.


    You don't need "I would tell you frankly", as it is superfluous. Why is posting on Internet forums a troublesome business?

    • Spooner in this regard stated that, "maybe we should acknowledge that in the postmodern age, the reader, not the writer, is the real tyrant: multi-tasking, channel-surfing, capricious and fickle, free to interpret, misread, manipulate, and (horrors) apply. We're all guilty; we start at the end, in the middle, we don't finish, we joyously juxtapose bits of what we read with other readings, other experiences. But the point is that this is our most natural process. Both reader and writer are engaged constantly in making knowledge from a very random world'. (274)


    You need to use the same kind of quote marks at the end of the quotation as you do at the beginning. What are your own words? (I don't know who Spooner is, but I disagree that we make knowledge. We acquire knowledge.)

    • Can our words be perceived the way they meant for?


    Can our words be perceived the way we mean them to be perceived?

    Do you really want to use can there?

    • No one can guarantee you this, since each individual automatically internalizes information and places them in different categories in his/her mind


    Replace them with it.

    • in which it is hard for you to know where each single person placed the desired information that goes with what you really approach...Moreover some readers have no storages or categories for certain information, because they have no MONITOR for it ( when you have a monitor it means that you are not selective in your reading, in fact, you try to read and comprehend to gain more knowledge about any information your eyes caught) this can be because such readers (with no monitor) automatically delete such information in which their long and working memories are standstill empty of such information...So those who unfortunately lack these monitors, will very often misunderstand (disabuse) the point of the messages that embedded in writings.


    I am not sure whether you think a monitor is a good thing or a bad thing or even what it is. I suggest that you shorten your sentences and that you work to achieve greater clarity.

    :)

  6. #6
    salem Guest
    Hi RonBee
    THank you very much for your valuable feedback, I will try to make my writing as cleare as possible. You know I am L2 student and such feedback is very important for me. I am interested in writing about different topics that are not directly focused on L2; they are common knowledge and educational in general.

    Thank you for gining me some of your time, and hopefully next time I will write better.

    Best wishes and love

  7. #7
    RonBee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by salem
    Hi RonBee
    THank you very much for your valuable feedback, I will try to make my writing as cleare as possible. You know I am L2 student and such feedback is very important for me. I am interested in writing about different topics that are not directly focused on L2; they are common knowledge and educational in general.

    Thank you for gining me some of your time, and hopefully next time I will write better.

    Best wishes and love
    Pardon my ignorance, but what is an L2 student?

    Have you visited very many other forums?

    Are there any discussions on this one that have caught your interest?

    What is your favorite subject?

    Is that enough questions?

    :wink:

  8. #8
    salem Guest
    Hi RonBee
    L2 learner (Student), a learner who study English as second language, and resides in the U.S.A or where English is a dominant language.

    I have particpated in two American forums but nobody respond to me. I really like your web because it has many materials that are helpeful for students who want to improve their English language. As I am going to be teaching college students I may use your web with my students when I am done with my study.

    There are many subjects that interested me, and I think they will be good resources for L1 learners, those who do not live in the usa.
    thank you very much

    salem

  9. #9
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    Suggestions, comments

    May I make some suggestions?

    • L2 learner (Student), a learner who study English as second language, and resides in the U.S.A or where English is a dominant language.


    An L2 learner is a person who studies English as a second language and lives in the USA or anywhere English is the dominant language. (Altho lives seems less formal and is more usual, you can use resides, especially if you want to emphasize that the situation is temporary.)

    • I have particpated in two American forums but nobody respond to me. I really like your web because it has many materials that are helpeful for students who want to improve their English language. As I am going to be teaching college students I may use your web with my students when I am done with my study.


    I have participated in two American forums but nobody responded to me. I really like your website, because it has many materials that are helpful to students who want to improve their English language skills. As I am going to be teaching college students, I may use your website with my students when I am done with my studies.

    In the second sentence, while students is not wrong, it is almost a redundancy. (Those who are studying something are by definition students.) I would say "people who wish to...." As I said tho, students is not wrong there. In the third sentence, while done is not wrong, many would prefer finished.

    • There are many subjects that interested me, and I think they will be good resources for L1 learners, those who do not live in the usa.


    There are many subjects that interest me, and I think they would be good resources for L1 learners, those who do not live in the USA.

    I am not really sure what you mean by that sentence. In any case, the reason I asked that question was that it is easier for somebody to write about things that interest him because (1) simply because those things interest him he is more highly motivated to write about those things and (2) he knows more about those things, so here is likely to have a higher degree of confidence when writing about them. Thus, at least at the start, it is good to write about the things that interest you most.

    What do you think?

    :)

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