Results 1 to 2 of 2
  1. #1
    Bassim is offline Senior Member
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Student or Learner
      • Native Language:
      • Serbo-Croatian
      • Home Country:
      • Bosnia Herzegovina
      • Current Location:
      • Sweden
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    806
    Post Thanks / Like

    Please, could you proofread my text

    One morning the flow of his thoughts was interrupted by the middle-aged man who stepped inside, telling him that he was a psychiatrist ordered by the judge to make an interview with him and asses his mental status. He was about sixty years old, overweight, sweaty and looked like a member of the Alcoholics Anonymous.

    His reddened face was swollen with puffy bags under his eyes and the lumps of fat on his jaws. His grey hair was receding and now was tousled. As he uttered his words, Peter could feel the smell of alcohol assailing his nostrils. The man must have been preparing himself properly for this interview during the weekend, using alcoholic drinks to strengthen his mind. That was probably his way to cope with all the madmen he had to talk to for the rest of the week.

    Peter was not in mood to talk to anyone that morning. His mind was whirling with a myriad of thoughts and ideas and he was devising plans and strategies against Mr Propagandist and his henchmen. If he were not properly prepared they were going to cut him into pieces. He was alone, honest and oversensitive, while they were callous, sly and merciless.

    They had the most powerful weapons in their hands: the media, news channels, tabloids, talk shows and soap operas, while he had only his speech.

    They were masters of spectacles, glamorous entertainment and glittering pageant and they could keep masses spellbound for days on end and make them love illusion more than reality. What could he come up with? His old dull Biblical stories about evil and good, The Ten Commandments, the everlasting fires of Hell or beautiful rivers of Paradise?

    If he were going to give a speech nobody was going to listen to him, except a few religious fanatics and outcasts who were already on the fringe of society and who nobody took seriously.

    And now they had sent this alcoholic to confirm his insanity! Of course, he was insane, coming here in this materialistic world, preaching freedom from everyone and love between nations and people.

  2. #2
    Bassim is offline Senior Member
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Student or Learner
      • Native Language:
      • Serbo-Croatian
      • Home Country:
      • Bosnia Herzegovina
      • Current Location:
      • Sweden
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    806
    Post Thanks / Like

    Re: Please, could you proofread my text

    Dear Gil.

    Thank you so much. Your help has been invaluable to me.

    God bless you.

Similar Threads

  1. Please, could you proofread my text
    By Bassim in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 02-Sep-2010, 20:58
  2. Please, could you proofread my text
    By Bassim in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 10-Aug-2010, 23:21
  3. Please could you proofread my text
    By Bassim in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 16-Jul-2010, 17:32
  4. proofread this text
    By Offroad in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 12-Sep-2009, 18:56
  5. Can you proofread this text, please?
    By Jupa in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 02-Jun-2005, 18:17

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •