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    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Student or Learner
      • Native Language:
      • Polish
      • Home Country:
      • Poland
      • Current Location:
      • Poland

    • Join Date: Nov 2010
    • Posts: 2
    • Post Thanks / Like
    #1

    Personal statement correction request

    Hello,

    I'm from Poland and I need Your help. I'm not so good at writing yet but I'm going to apply for Video Games Design course at the Wolverhampton University. I have written a draft of my Personal statement but before I ask other people for an opinion, I need to have it proofread. As far as I'm concerned it is a bit too short but I will try to extend it. I was following guidelines that I found on the internet but could you please read it and correct grammar mistakes. Of course any other advices (eg content-related) will be much appreciated!

    Thanks in advance!

    My interest in video games dates back to my early childhood years. True passion for games have shaped my current goals. My main aspiration is to design and create playable and immersive game worlds for AAA titles. I have plenty of other interests that help me to create convincing game environments and story lines such as psychology in games (conscious and subconscious decisions that are made by gamer and his reactions to colours, sounds etc.) , history of architecture and architecture itself, Project and team management techniques. I believe that Wolverhampton University will provide me an opportunity to spread my knowledge in field of video games design realm.

    I have taken up games development back when I was in my Primary school. I was designing various levels and modifications for the GoldenSource and the Source Engine. My biggest amateur project called 'TEAR' gave me an opportunity to improve my leadership, teamwork and artistic abilities. My main objective back then was to get a paid job in games industry and gain precious experience. 'The Farm 51' acknowledged Polish games developer gave me such an opportunity. While I was working in the professional game development studio I was responsible for creating graphic content for PC and Console titles. I learned to meet high quality standarts for next-generation games as well as meeting deadlines and time management. Unfortunately I have to gave it up, so I could focus on my matura preparation. Meanwhile, I am practising with one of the most powerful and up-to-date technology, Unreal Development Kit. I am sure that earning a Bachelor’s degree in “Video Games Design” is next step in my development process and I can not even imagine more suitable field to pursue for me.

    Aside from career aspirations and achievements I was fascinated with Physics and Astronomy at my secondary school. In addition, I was attending to the extra-curricular Physics lessons. Furthermore, I realized that IT and software knowledge is essential for me, so I enrolled for the ECDL course. I passed all modules successfully and gained certificate. It gave me an understanding of various aspects of IT such as Word processing, Databases, Information and Communication etc. The next thing is that I have been learning English language since Primary school. I always believed that it will help me succeed in my future endeavours.

    All this considered, through all those year I was trying to get a balance between good marks at school and building an unique art portfolio. I greatly look forward to the challenge of a demanding degree choice and I am confident that I have the academic ability, determination and personal qualities to make a success of it.

  1. Jay Louise's Avatar
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Other
      • Native Language:
      • English
      • Home Country:
      • United States
      • Current Location:
      • United States

    • Join Date: Jun 2010
    • Posts: 68
    • Post Thanks / Like
    #2

    Re: Personal statement correction request

    Quote Originally Posted by Tepcio View Post
    Hello,

    I'm from Poland and I need Your help. I'm not so good at writing yet but I'm going to apply for Video Games Design course at the Wolverhampton University. I have written a draft of my Personal statement but before I ask other people for an opinion, I need to have it proofread. As far as I'm concerned it is a bit too short but I will try to extend it. I was following guidelines that I found on the internet but could you please read it and correct grammar mistakes. Of course any other advices (eg content-related) will be much appreciated!

    Thanks in advance!

    My interest in video games dates back to my early childhood years. A true passion for games have has shaped my current goals. My main aspiration is to design and create playable and immersive game worlds for AAA titles. I have plenty of (many) other interests that have helped me to create convincing game environments and story lines such as psychology in games (conscious and subconscious decisions that are made by gamer and his reactions to colours, sounds etc.), history of architecture and architecture itself, project and team management techniques. I believe that Wolverhampton University will provide me with an opportunity to spread increase my knowledge in the field of video games design realm. (either "the field of video game design" or "the video game design realm")

    I have taken took up games development back when I was in my Primary school. I was designing various levels and modifications for the GoldenSource and the Source Engine. My biggest amateur project called 'TEAR' gave me an opportunity to improve my leadership, teamwork and artistic abilities. My main objective back then was to get a paid job in games industry and gain precious experience. 'The Farm 51', an acknowledged Polish games developer, gave me such an opportunity. While I was working in the professional game development studio I was responsible for creating graphic content for PC and Console titles. I learned to meet high quality standards for next-generation games as well as meeting deadlines and time management. Unfortunately I have had to gave it up so I could focus on my matura preparation. Meanwhile, I am practising with one of the most powerful and up-to-date technology, Unreal Development Kit. I am sure that earning a Bachelor’s degree in “Video Games Design” is the next step in my development process, and I can not even imagine a more suitable field for me to pursue for me.

    Aside from career aspirations and achievements, I was fascinated with Physics and Astronomy at my secondary school. In addition, I was attending to the extra-curricular Physics lessons. Furthermore, I realized that IT and software knowledge is essential for me so I enrolled for in the ECDL course. I passed all modules successfully and gained received a certificate. It gave me an understanding of various aspects of IT such as Word processing, Databases, Information and Communication etc. The next thing is that I have also been learning the English language since Primary school. I always believed that it will help me succeed in my future endeavours.

    All this considered, Through all those years I was trying to get a balance between good marks at school and building an unique art portfolio. I greatly look forward to the challenge of a demanding degree choice and I am confident that I have the academic ability, determination and personal qualities to make a success of it.
    Let me say that I am a Gamer. Big time. MMORPGs, stand alones, PC, XBOX. If it is a good game made in the last decade, it is in my house.

    I think that this is a strong personal statement. Be careful of trying to add too much because you think it is too short. You might end up diluting your point.

    Best of Luck to you. I hope to play your games someday soon.

    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Student or Learner
      • Native Language:
      • Polish
      • Home Country:
      • Poland
      • Current Location:
      • Poland

    • Join Date: Nov 2010
    • Posts: 2
    • Post Thanks / Like
    #3

    Re: Personal statement correction request

    Thank You so much !!

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