Results 1 to 2 of 2
  1. #1
    Jaden_Zion is offline Newbie
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Student or Learner
      • Native Language:
      • Bulgarian
      • Home Country:
      • Bulgaria
      • Current Location:
      • Bulgaria
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Posts
    1
    Post Thanks / Like

    I could really use a hand here...

    Hi there. First post on the forum. I'm currently in the long winded and rigid process of applying to Erasmus University in Rotterdam. Great place, could be "the one". I spent/wasted two years of my life naively thinking that my parents would find money for me to continue my education - alas, I live in Bulgaria, money isn't our "thing", so I decided to do things my way and I'm almost there. However, my sob story is as useless to you as rubber lips on a woodpecker. I need some help with this motivational letter. I don't know anyone else other than my former English teacher that could proof read and help me out. I believe I focused on all the points that E.U wanted which are ...


    • Your international background, including nationality, place of birth, place of residence, previous education, and international experience;
    • Why you wish to take a bachelor’s degree in communications and media;
    • Why you want to enrol in IBCoM (instead of another programme in communications and media);
    • Why you would like to attend Erasmus University Rotterdam;
    • Your international career aspirations.


    .. you tell me. I tried to keep it as short as possible, I know it's better when it's shorter and to the point but I feel like if I cut more fat the poor thing will die from anorexia. If you find something that can be given the boot - feel free to edit it out. I tend to make an argument and then harp on that for a few sentences. Overall, tell me what can be done, edit it, abuse it in any way you want. Excuse me for my grammar and punctuation, I'm from Bulgaria and just like money, foreign languages aren't our "thing". I'm doing fine but it could be better.

    One thing about this letter that I could've done wrong, and it could be just me being picky, is that it's not fluid. I seem to jump from point to point without bridging the two together, as if I'm answering separate questions. I could use some help there if I need any.

    P.S: I'm not sure how I should format the damn thing. Where should I put my name, address, or what should I put before the letter begins. Should I begin it as I did with "To whom it may concern" as I don't know who'll receive it, I know it's an institution. Did I end it well and how should I? That sort of thing.

    ---------------------------------------------------------------------

    To whom it may concern,

    I appreciate this opportunity to provide further background information in support of my application to the International Media and Communications program at Erasmus University for the 2011 autumn term.

    I was born in Sofia and raised in Kustendil. While Kustendil is not a mammoth of a city, the caliber of its educational institutions is not to be underestimated, as Language high school "Dr.Petar Beron" granted me the liberty of attaining solid knowledge in French and English, among other subjects, igniting a thus far dormant passion for the spoken and written word.

    Language high school "Dr.Petar Beron" was the breeding ground for my ambitions in the field of communications and media. It was early in my education when I became aware of my knack for getting what I want through verbal means and proving my point much better than my peers as I would often engage in debates during class, with both students and teachers, thus developing my critical thinking and satisfying my need for innovation by coming up with new solutions to common problems. I was frequently the go-to student to host presentations on different subjects, in different languages for different audiences, presenting ideas from the class to the principle and vica versa.

    My decision to dedicate the next three years of my life studying communications and media stems from my strong interest in communications between a vast array of cultural and professional backgrounds, as well as the rapid rate at which the media world has grown over the last decade, proving to be a modern area of study that keeps maturing day by day. I've always been an individual that is able to roll with the punches, adapt to swift changes and eclipse the rest in a minimal amount of time, and it seems that this programme embodies all of that, which leads me to believe that I'll fit nicely in such an environment.

    My professional longings are not bottled up, especially by a border or cultural background, as I see myself working in international setting which influences a plethora of areas. As of right now I don't have my sights set on a particular area, and that's why IBCoM's variety of electives and focus areas will play a key role in finding what I need. The profoundness of the subjects offered in the IBCoM programme is one of the reasons why I think it's superior to many other programmes of that nature. Even though it covers a lot of ground, it's not dry and it touches on the most contemporary aspects of communications and media. That by itself will broaden the spectrum of skills I'll attain before I finish my studies. I'm a firm believer that innovation and thinking outside the box are the two abilities that separate the men from the boys and IBCoM is just the place for me to develop those skills.

    Erasmus University is exactly what I need in terms of education and environment, as being in constant contact with students from all over the world will enrich my understanding of different cultures. The key factor that made me choose Erasmus University is how internationally friendly it is. I have never set foot outside of Bulgaria and the possible transition will be tough to get used to as the two cultures are so very different. It is important that the University I go to is internationally acclaimed, and Erasmus University is even more than that - it's one of the top Universities in the world. The lecturers themselves are a crucial part of the educational process, and all have a strong professional background. They're people I can trust to help me develop the skills I'll need in the future. Choosing IBCoM at Erasmus University was without a shadow of a doubt one of the easiest decisions I made in my life.

    Sincerely,

    Antoan Markov

    -----------------------------------------------------------------------
    Last edited by Jaden_Zion; 27-Jan-2011 at 19:13.

  2. #2
    5jj's Avatar
    5jj is offline VIP Member
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Retired English Teacher
      • Native Language:
      • British English
      • Home Country:
      • England
      • Current Location:
      • Czech Republic
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Posts
    28,167
    Post Thanks / Like

    Re: I could really use a hand here...

    What follows is a personal view, not that of an expert in motivational letters:


    I appreciate this opportunity to provide further background information in support of my application to the International Media and Communications program at Erasmus University for the 2011 autumn term. Fine

    I was born in Sofia and raised in Kustendil. While Kustendil is not a mammoth of a city, the caliber of its educational institutions is not to be underestimated, as Language high school "Dr.Petar Beron" granted me the liberty of attaining solid knowledge in French and English, among other subjects, igniting a thus far dormant passion for the spoken and written word.
    where the teachers in my high school led me to a love of learning about language.
    Language high school "Dr.Petar Beron" was the breeding ground for my ambitions in the field of communications and media. It was early in my education when I became aware of my knack for getting what I want through verbal means and proving my point much better than my peers as I would often engage in debates during class, with both students and teachers, thus developing my critical thinking and satisfying my need for innovation by coming up with new solutions to common problems. I was frequently the go-to student to host presentations on different subjects, in different languages for different audiences, presenting ideas from the class to the principle and vica versa. . I learnt, and learnt to enjoy, the cut-and-thrust of student debate, and my success in this area enabled me to assist other students in their preparation of presentations.

    My decision to dedicate the next three years of my life studying communications and media stems from my strong interest in communications between a vast array of cultural and professional backgrounds, as well as the rapid rate at which the media world has grown over the last decade, proving to be a modern area of study that keeps maturing day by day. I've always been an individual that is able to roll with the punches, adapt to swift changes and eclipse the rest in a minimal amount of time, and it seems that this programme embodies all of that, which leads me to believe that I'll fit nicely in such an environment.
    My strong interest in communications between different cultural and professional backgrounds and the rapid rate at which the media world has grown over the last decade has led to my desire to study communications and media stems [I don't know what they are - 5jj]

    My professional longings are not bottled up, especially by a border or cultural background, as I see myself working in international setting which influences a plethora of areas. As of right now I don't have my sights set on a particular area, and that's why IBCoM's variety of electives and focus areas will play a key role in finding what I need. The profoundness of the subjects offered in the IBCoM programme is one of the reasons why I think it's superior to many other programmes of that nature. Even though it covers a lot of ground, it's not dry and it touches on the most contemporary aspects of communications and media. That by itself will broaden the spectrum of skills I'll attain before I finish my studies. I'm a firm believer that innovation and thinking outside the box are the two abilities that separate the men from the boys and IBCoM is just the place for me to develop those skills. My desire to study with IC0BM stems from IBCoM's variety of electives and focus areas, which will play a key role in finding what I need in the future. The ICoBM programme appears to me to touch on the most contemporary aspects of communications and media, which will broaden my spectrum of skills.

    I will leave the remaining paragraph to others.
    I am not sure whether this will help, but - good luck.

Similar Threads

  1. on the other hand
    By Abstract Idea in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 12-Sep-2009, 03:28
  2. work hand in hand
    By Tan Elaine in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 20-Feb-2009, 16:56
  3. hand something out - hand out something
    By ripley in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 18-Sep-2008, 19:51
  4. Hand in Hand vs. Hand in Glove
    By doobadoo in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 04-Oct-2006, 14:59
  5. let my hand go off?
    By basharath2 in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 28-Jun-2006, 08:14

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •