Hi All, please proofread this essay and suggest me alternate way constructing a sentence for the underlined sentences. Thank you.
Debate: Pick one side or the other
Nano car will add to the pollution and congestion in the cities. Do you agree or disagree? Please choose one and give your reasons.
Nano car, the world’s cheapest car which was designed by Tata Motors India was launched in the end of 20XX. Since the announcement of Tata’s plan to design the world cheapest car and to its launch recently, there have been many speculations about its performance, its influence on traffic on Indian roads and on pollution.
Nano is the outcome of Ratan Tata’s dream of replacing the two wheeler bikes which are widely used by Indian middle class to accommodate their little family of three or four members. It is a Tata’s gift to the Indian middle class. The sales of Nano have increased drastically to XXXXXX units within a period of 3 months. This uncorrelated increase of Nano cars with the expansion of roads in Indian cities will/definitely increase traffic and add congestion. This problem will arise not only due to the rise in the number of Nano cars, but also due to increase in the area occupied a Nano car on Indian roads. For example, a Nano car occupies an area which is equal to the area occupied by 2 or 3 bikes on Indian roads which will add more congestion.
In addition to the traffic problem, Nano also increases pollution. To design such a cheap car at $2200, Tata Motors had implemented many alternate methods to cut down the cost of design which affected its performance especially, low carbon emission. Many experts claim that Nano is not a clean-burning car and it will add to the world carbon emissions, but Tata Motors says that Nano’s carbon emissions (110gm/km) are less than that of high-end motor cycles in India, so the net carbon emissions will be lower than what they would have been. It may take few more months to assess the performance of Nano.
When asked Ratan Tata about presumed increase in pollution and congestion with the increase in use of Nano, he responded that it is the responsibility of government to develop mass transit system to cope with the traffic in crowded
Indian cities. Yes, he is correct; according the traffic experts, public transit system must fulfill 70% commuting needs to avoid traffic problems, but it is fulfilling only 30 – 40 % of commuting needs. Creating/designing an efficient traffic system will help in reducing the traffic and it also help the middle class people to enjoy the fruits of innovation like Nano.
Last edited by bspkumar; 10-Feb-2011 at 20:04.