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  1. #1
    aleycris Guest

    Would you correct this article?

    Hello,
    It's me again. Now I wrote an article, would you correct me?

    Regards.
    Alejandro

    Code:
    “Visiting Buenos Aires”
    	If you are planning to come to Buenos Aires you must consider this advises.
    	There are a lot of wonderful places, but depends on the time this places will be safe o dangerous. For examples, I suggest visiting “San Telmo”, because it has a few “artesanal” store where you can find tango objects and other tings. “San Telmo” is safer during the day but at night you must be careful because it became dangerous. Apart form that, it is a good idea to visit “Puerto Madero” because is near “Rio de la Plata” so you have a marvellous view and there are several restaurant that prepare argentine dishes. “Puerto Madero” is much more safer than “San Telmo” because there are a lot of security persons so you can go in any hours.
    On the other hand, it’s a waste of time going to “Once” because you can’t find any interesting place, you only find clothes store but for me I prefer buying clothes in other place because I know that the clothes sell in once is for a second hand.
    Buenos Aires has few shopping mall and I believe that is the better way to buy sourvenier for your relatives. In my opinion a good present is something like mate or other tradicional product.
    In conclusion, Buenos Aires is a great city but you must be careful about what you do in it.

  2. #2
    Tdol is offline Editor, UsingEnglish.com
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    Re: Would you correct this article?

    “Visiting Buenos Aires”
    If you are planning to come to Buenos Aires you must consider this advice.
    There are a lot of wonderful places, but depending on the time these places might be safe or dangerous. For example, I suggest visiting “San Telmo”, because it has a few craft stores where you can find tango objects and other things. “San Telmo” is safer during the day but at night you must be careful because it gets dangerous. Apart from that, it is a good idea to visit “Puerto Madero” because is near “Rio de la Plata” so you have a marvellous view and there are several restaurants that prepare Argentine dishes. “Puerto Madero” is much safer than “San Telmo” because there are a lot of security staff so you can go at any time.
    On the other hand, it’s a waste of time going to “Once” because you can’t find any interesting places, you only find clothes stores, but for me I prefer buying clothes in other places because I know that the clothes sold are second hand.
    Buenos Aires has few shopping malls and I believe that is a better way to buy souvenirs for your relatives. In my opinion a good present is something like mate (???) or other traditional products.
    In conclusion, Buenos Aires is a great city but you must be careful about what you do in it.


    HTH

    I hope our language tweeking expert RonBee will pass through and offer some improvements.

  3. #3
    RonBee's Avatar
    RonBee is offline Moderator
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    Re: Would you correct this article?

    "Visiting Buenos Aires”
    That is a good start. :wink:

    (I will put my suggested changes in blue.)

    • First paragraph:


    If you are planning to come to Buenos Aires you must consider this advises.
    If you are planning to come to Buenos Aires, you must consider this advice.

    The word advices is rarely, if ever, used. Instead, whether the person made one suggestion or several suggestions it is still just advice.

    There are a lot of wonderful places, but depends on the time this places will be safe o dangerous.
    There are a lot of wonderful places to visit in Buenos Aires, but some neighborhoods should be avoided at night.

    There is, of course, nothing wrong with "There are a lot of wonderful places", but it doesn't fit very well with the rest of that sentence. Also, the phrase you are looking for is "but depending on the time of day...."

    For examples, I suggest visiting “San Telmo”, because it has a few “artesanal” store where you can find tango objects and other tings.
    One good place to visit is San Telmo, because it has a few artesanal” stores where you can find tango objects and other things.

    You can say for example, but for examples is not used. I would not, obviously, use for example in that sentence anyhow.

    “San Telmo” is safer during the day but at night you must be careful because it became dangerous.
    San Telmo is safer during the day than at night. I don't recommend going there at night.

    That is a good place to start a new paragraph.

    Apart form that, it is a good idea to visit “Puerto Madero” because is near “Rio de la Plata” so you have a marvellous view and there are several restaurant that prepare argentine dishes.
    Another good place to visit is Puerto Madero, which has a marvelous view of the Rio de la Plata. There are several restaurants there that prepare Argentine dishes.

    I do not recommend using Apart from that. It is not, I think, a good way to start a sentence.

    “Puerto Madero” is much more safer than “San Telmo” because there are a lot of security persons so you can go in any hours.
    Puerto Madero is much safer than San Telmo, because there are quite a few security guards there. You can go to Puerto Madero any time of the day.

    Next paragraph:

    On the other hand, it’s a waste of time going to “Once” because you can’t find any interesting place, you only find clothes store but for me I prefer buying clothes in other place because I know that the clothes sell in once is for a second hand.
    I do not recommend going to Once, because it only has clothing stores, and the clothing is second-hand at that.

    Buenos Aires has few shopping mall and I believe that is the better way to buy sourvenier for your relatives.
    Buenos Aires has a few shopping malls, and I recommend visiting one of them if you wish to buy a souvenir for one of your relatives.

    In my opinion a good present is something like mate or other tradicional product.
    In my opinion, a good present would be something like mate or another traditional product.

    In conclusion, Buenos Aires is a great city but you must be careful about what you do in it.
    Buenos Aires is a great city, and you can have a wonderful time there if you take the proper safety precautions.

    The only reason to use "In conclusion" is to warn your audience that your speech is about to come to an end. :wink:

    I think that in such a brief article you should focus on telling people where they should go and not bother telling them where they shouldn't go (except for safety concerns).

    Did I make any mistakes?

    :)

  4. #4
    aleycris Guest
    Hi RonBee, i think that your corrections are good.

    Thanks
    Alejandro

  5. #5
    Tdol is offline Editor, UsingEnglish.com
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    Aleycris, what's 'mate'?

  6. #6
    RonBee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tdol
    Aleycris, what's 'mate'?
    I want to know that one myself.

    :wink:

  7. #7
    aleycris Guest
    Mate, mmmm is difficult to describe in english. Is a king of beverague that we drink for example in the breakfast (other people drink it all the day).
    It a glass, generaly made of some calabash or wood, you put on it a lightbulb (straw) and you fill the mate with herb (yerba mate). After that you put hot water on it. You can add sugar or other herb.

    I hpe thet ytou can image what is a mate.

    Regards.

  8. #8
    aleycris Guest
    Here you have a better explanation about mate: http://www.noborders.net/mate/

    Do you think that my explanation is similar to this one?

    Regards.

  9. #9
    RonBee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by aleycris
    Here you have a better explanation about mate: http://www.noborders.net/mate/
    That's quite interesting. Did you find the error on that page?

    :wink:

  10. #10
    RonBee's Avatar
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    May I make a suggestion or two?

    Mate, mmmm is difficult to describe in english.
    That is good. (Capitalize English.)

    Is a king of beverague that we drink for example in the breakfast (other people drink it all the day).
    You don't need to say it is a kind of beverage.

    Try:

    • It is a beverage that we drink, for example, at breakfast. (Some people drink it all day long.)


    It a glass, generaly made of some calabash or wood, you put on it a lightbulb (straw) and you fill the mate with herb (yerba mate). After that you put hot water on it.
    • You put some yerba mate in a glass (generally made of calabash or wood) and you mix it with hot water.


    I'm not sure I got that exactly right. In any case, that would be a cup, not a glass.

    You can add sugar, or other herb.
    • You can add sugar or you can add other herbs.


    (The original seems to suggest that sugar is an herb.)

    I hpe thet ytou can image what is a mate.
    • I hope that you can now imagine what mate is.


    :D

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