[Essay] Can you correct this essay please?

[dilodi83]

Education in Italy is a very hot subject. Some people think it is very good, others think it is very bad. During the latest years many ministers of education have followed each other. Each one of them has tried to do reforms to improve the system of education in the Italian school and they all have failed really often. In fact, most of these reforms have proved to be unnecessary and a very little useful. Today, I think that the Italian school is really weak. The present govern has been trying to modify the system of education for 2 years, through a complete project of renovation. The Italian govern and its president of the ministers, Silvio Berlusconi, has planned to turn upside down the entire world of school and even that of University. The govern has decided and formulated the well-know in Italy program of three-I, that is, more study of the English language, more study of Internet and of the computer science and a better connection between the world of school and university and that of work. His first aim is now to form girls and boys who are able to speak English well, who manage to turn on and off a personal computer and, at the same time, to serf on the net. Moreover, the govern is also trying to help students to get ready for the world of work, by creating, or, trying to create new jobs. Of course, this is only a project and the concrete results are very little.
In the south of Italy, for example, many of these young people do not find any kind of jobs and they are really often forced to move to the north of the country just to have at least a chance to get a good job. But it is important to highlight that today even in the rich and industrialized north many of them cannot find any sort of job because of the huge world economic crisis. Schools and, above all universities, should give the immediate chance to obtain a job, but many people who have studied hard and who also have a degree cannot find any job.
I think, of course, that school has the task, the duty, to form girls and boys well, but they also have to have the possibility to find a job for their own future. I also believe that the govern’s reforms are not enough and he should find out an alternative solution with the other European countries to resolve this particular and important problem of our society.

 

[Route21]

Hi dilodi83

My first pass suggestions - others may be able to improve further:

Education in Italy is a very hot subject. Some people think it is very good; others think it is very bad.

There has been a succession of Ministers of Education in Italy in recent years. Each has tried their own reforms to improve the Italian education system and all have regularly failed. In fact, most of these reforms have proved either unnecessary or of very little use. I believe that the Italian education system is currently very weak.

The present government has been trying to modify the education system for 2 years, through a complete renovation project. They, and Italian President Silvio Berlusconi, have planned to turn the entire world of school and even the unversities upside down .

The government has formulated a program, well-known in Italy, of 3i's - involving greater emphasis on the study of a) the English language, b) Internet and computer science and also c) a better interrelationship between schools, universities and the workplace. Their primary aims are to enable students to i) speak English proficiently, ii) operate a personal computer and iii) surf the net. Moreover, the government is also trying to help students transition to the world of work by trying to create new jobs. This is, of course, only a project and concrete results, so far, are limited.

In the south of Italy, for example, many of these young people typically are unable to find any kind of job and are really forced to move to the north of the country to have any chance of a good job.

It is, however, important to highlight that today, even in the rich and industrialised north, many of them cannot find any sort of job because of the current world economic crisis. Schools and, above all, universities should be able to ensure the immediate chance of their students obtaining a job, but many who have studied hard and obtained a degree cannot find a job.

I believe that schools have the task and even the duty to not only educate students, but also to ensure they have the skills necessary to find a job to secure their future. I also believe that the government’s reforms are not enough and they need to find an alternative solution, with the other European countries, to this particular and important problem of our society.

Hope this helps
R21

 

[JTRiff]

Non-teacher.
( ) = delete
italics = add


Education in Italy is a very hot topic. ( 'hot topic' is much more common usage, something talked about, which is what this sentence suggests is happening.) Some people think it is a very good system, others think it is very bad. During (the latest) recent years, many ministers of education (have followed each other Each one of them has) have tried to (do) reform(s) (to) and improve the system of education in the Italian school, and (they all) have failed. (really often) In fact, most of these reforms have proven to be unnecessary. (and a very little useful)
Today (or Presently), I think that the Italian school of education is (really) very weak. The present government has been trying to modify the system of education for two years, (through) via a complete (project of) renovation project. The Italian government and its president (of the ministers), Silvio Berlusconi, (has) have planned to turn upside-down the entire world of grade school? and even that of University education.
The government (has decided and) formulated the now well-known, in Italy, three-I program, that is - more study of the English language, more study of the internet and (of the) computer science, and a better connection between the world of schooling (and university) and that of the workplace.
(His) Berlusconi's first (aim is now)objective is to (form girls and boys who are able to speak) help children speak English well. Boys and girls who can use (manage to turn a) personal computer and surf on the internet. Moreover, the government is also trying to help students (to) get ready for the world of work, by creating (or, trying to create) new jobs. Of course, this is only a project and (the concrete) positive results are very (little) small, to date.
In the south of Italy, for example, many (of these) young people (do not) cannot find any kind of job(s) and they are (really) often forced to move to the north of the country, just to have (at least) a chance (to get) of getting a good job. But, it is important to highlight that, today, even in the rich and industrialized north, many (of them) cannot find any sort of job because of the huge world economic crisis. Schools, and above all universities, should give the succesful student an immediate chance to obtain a job, but many people who have studied hard and who also have a degree cannot find any work.
I think (of course,) that the school has the task, the duty, to (form) teach boys and girls well, but they also (have to) must have the possibility (to) of finding a job, for their own future success. I also believe that the governments' reforms are not enough, and (he) that the president should (find out) devise an alternate solution, (with the) as should other European (countries) governments, in order to resolve this particularly (and) important problem of (our) society.


Could go various ways, hope any of this helped.