Please help me improve the following sentences?

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chowbarry

Junior Member
Joined
Apr 17, 2008
Member Type
Student or Learner
Native Language
Chinese
Home Country
China
Current Location
China
Please help me improve the following sentences?

1) Concerning the project of repairing the male toilet at ABC park, I phoned to Mr. A, the coordinator of Supplies Department's contractor, yesterday. Mr. A revealed that the repairing work is currently all but completed, only awaiting the completion of replacing several wash basins. Mr. A added that if they are permitted to close the male toilet for two days, the whole repairing work can be completed within three days times, one week earlier than the first estimated.

2) Two workers from TVD cleansing company went to ABC park yesterday morning and carried out the third anti-mosquito operation. (The remaining two operations will be held on 12.07.2011 and 29.07.2011) The operation was successfully finished at noon and no adverse report have been reported up to now. Please see the below pictures for your reference. Thank you for your attention!

Many thanks in advance!
 

billmcd

Key Member
Joined
Mar 27, 2009
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
English
Home Country
United States
Current Location
United States
Please help me improve the following sentences?

1) Concerning the project of repairing the male toilet at ABC park, I phoned [STRIKE]to [/STRIKE]Mr. A, the coordinator of Supplies Department's contractor, yesterday. Mr. A revealed (OR indicated) that the repair[STRIKE]ing[/STRIKE] work is currently all but completed, only awaiting the [STRIKE]completion [/STRIKE][STRIKE]of replacing [/STRIKE] the replacement of several wash basins. Mr. A added that if they are permitted to close the male toilet for two days, the whole repairing work can be completed within three days time[STRIKE]s[/STRIKE], one week earlier than the first estimate[STRIKE]d[/STRIKE].

2) Two workers from TVD cleansing company went to ABC park yesterday morning and carried out the third anti-mosquito operation. (The remaining two operations will be held on 12.07.2011 and 29.07.2011) The operation was successfully finished at noon and no adverse report [STRIKE]have[/STRIKE]has been [STRIKE]reported[/STRIKE]received up to now. Please see the below pictures for your reference. Thank you for your attention!

Many thanks in advance!

A few changes.
 

chowbarry

Junior Member
Joined
Apr 17, 2008
Member Type
Student or Learner
Native Language
Chinese
Home Country
China
Current Location
China
billmcd, thank you very much!
 
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