[Essay] can anyone plzzz plzzz correct this essay for me? short essay

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Aleezamo

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If you were given one million dollars to spend how would you spend it?
If I were given one million dollars I would open schools, build households and rest of the money would be given to a charity. There are many homeless people and they are dying of hunger. They do not have any place to live; so I would build as many households as I could. I will also provide them aid and nurses; who will stay in the households with them. On the hand, there are a lot of young youth who want to go to school, but they cannot go; because they do not have enough money, support and resources. So, I would build schools and I will provide free education to all the poor people. I would never ever want anyone to left behind; just because they did not have enough money to educate themselves. Also, there are many people who have terrible diseases and they stay in the hospitals. I would give money to every kind of hospitals; so there would be enough money for everyone to heal themselves. These people live a new life everyday. They invoke a bright and a new hope inside of themselves. They fight against their diseases because they want to live a normal life; just like everyone else in the world. I would never ever want to see anyone die; just because they did not have enough money to overcome from their illness. I would give up my whole entire life to save someone's life.
 

billmcd

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If you were given one million dollars to spend how would you spend it?
If I were given one million dollars, I would open schools, build households and the rest of the money would be given to a charity. There are many homeless people and they are dying of hunger. They do not have any place to live; so I would build as many households (OR homes OR shelters as I could. I [STRIKE]will[/STRIKE]would also provide them aid and [STRIKE]nurses[/STRIKE]round-the-clock nursing care[STRIKE]; who will stay in the households with them[/STRIKE]. [STRIKE]On the hand, [/STRIKE]There are a lot of young youth who want to go to school, but they cannot go; because they do not have enough money, support and resources. So, I would build schools and I [STRIKE]will[/STRIKE] would provide free education to all [STRIKE]the[/STRIKE] poor people. I would never ever want anyone to be left behind; just because they did not have enough money to educate themselves. Also, there are many people who have terrible diseases and they stay in the hospitals. I would give money to every kind of hospital[STRIKE]s[/STRIKE]so there would be enough money for everyone to [STRIKE]heal themselves[/STRIKE]recover. These people could live a new life everyday. They could invoke a bright and a new hope inside [STRIKE]of [/STRIKE]themselves. They would fight against their diseases because they want to live a normal life; just like everyone else in the world. I would never ever want to see anyone die; just because they did not have enough money to overcome [STRIKE]from[/STRIKE] their illness. I would give up my whole entire life to save someone's life.

A few suggestions and some of your semicolons are not necessary.
 

Rover_KE

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And please stick to a simple please.

All those unnecessary zs don't impress anybody.

Rover
 
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