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  1. #1
    adnanmushtaq is offline Newbie
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    Default please point out my mistakes

    It is an obvious fact,that all modern descoveries in the field of technology are playing a vital role in this modern er,. for instance computer, laptop,simulator, i pad, mp3, and advance mobile phones. Above all are making our life easier in order to achieve our goals and objectives.

    As a student, the availability of data or information is not a big deal now. computers have expedited the acquisitions of knowledge.while in medical profession, computers are being used to operate the complicated surgeries successfully. International business deals are just clicks away. china and Japan are assembling metallic robots to get domestic chores done, controlled by this device.

    Despite of the fact, computer is becoming a integral part of our rushed lives but it is also making us remarkably dependent. people prefer to dispatch(send) electronic mail instead of seeing personally. it is continuously increasing obscenity within people.

    On line shopping always has been a risk for customers. The reasons of this threat are the fraud and misrepresentation of product. To give full details of credit card is always full of apprehensions for buyers.

    In addition to that criminals are utilizing this facility to plot their plan as a tool. LONDON s riots are the example of misuse of this technology. social networks like Facebook and twitter are used to communicate without leaving any proof of identity. china and Japan are trying to operate the robots, for war purpose, with this device which could lead this world to mass destruction.

    In the light of above arguments, we can conclude with these words that the pros of this device are inevitable and significant than its cons. The adverse effects could be minimised by doing relevant legislation by government. Precautionary measures should be taken in this aspect to prevent misuse of this valuable technology. There should be a authentic department to apply scrutiny and control particularly these criminal activities.

  2. #2
    adnanmushtaq is offline Newbie
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    Default computer technology

    It is an obvious fact,that all modern descoveries in the field of technology are playing a vital role in this modern er,. for instance computer, laptop,simulator, i pad, mp3, and advance mobile phones. Above all are making our life easier in order to achieve our goals and objectives.

    As a student, the availability of data or information is not a big deal now. computers have expedited the acquisitions of knowledge.while in medical profession, computers are being used to operate the complicated surgeries successfully. International business deals are just clicks away. china and Japan are assembling metallic robots to get domestic chores done, controlled by this device.

    Despite of the fact, computer is becoming a integral part of our rushed lives but it is also making us remarkably dependent. people prefer to dispatch(send) electronic mail instead of seeing personally. it is continuously increasing obscenity within people.

    On line shopping always has been a risk for customers. The reasons of this threat are the fraud and misrepresentation of product. To give full details of credit card is always full of apprehensions for buyers.

    In addition to that criminals are utilizing this facility to plot their plan as a tool. LONDON s riots are the example of misuse of this technology. social networks like Facebook and twitter are used to communicate without leaving any proof of identity. china and Japan are trying to operate the robots, for war purpose, with this device which could lead this world to mass destruction.

    In the light of above arguments, we can conclude with these words that the pros of this device are inevitable and significant than its cons. The adverse effects could be minimised by doing relevant legislation by government. Precautionary measures should be taken in this aspect to prevent misuse of this valuable technology. There should be a authentic department to apply scrutiny and control particularly these criminal activities.

  3. #3
    emsr2d2's Avatar
    emsr2d2 is offline Moderator
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    Default Re: please point out my mistakes

    Quote Originally Posted by adnanmushtaq View Post
    It is an obvious fact (one or the other, either "It is obvious" or "It is a fact") [no comma] that all modern discoveries in the field of technology are playing a vital role in this modern era, for instance computers, laptops, simulators, the i-Pad, mp3 players, and advanced mobile phones. Above all, They are making our lives easier in order and helping us to achieve our goals and objectives.
    This is a very long piece to have posted here so I have dealt with only the first paragraph as I have other fish to fry.

  4. #4
    Rover_KE is offline Moderator
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    Default Re: computer technology

    A bit more:

    As a student, I find that the availability of data or information is not a big deal now. Computers have expedited the acquisitions of knowledge, while in the medical profession, computers are being used to operate the complicated surgeries successfully. I HOPE NOT! I'd want a proper surgeon to operate on me. International business deals are just clicks away. China and Japan are assembling metallic robots to get domestic chores done, controlled by this device.


    Rover

  5. #5
    adnanmushtaq is offline Newbie
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    Default Re: please point out my mistakes

    i meant, robots, who operate surgeries controlled by computers. thanks for your time

  6. #6
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    Default Re: please point out my mistakes

    Quote Originally Posted by adnanmushtaq View Post
    Despite of the fact What fact?, computers are becoming an integral part of our rushed lives but it is also and are making us remarkably dependent on what?. People prefer to dispatch(send) electronic mail instead of seeing personally speaking directly to each other. It is continuously increasing obscenity within people. I have no idea what this means.

    Online shopping always has been a can be risky for customers because of . The reasons of this threat are the fraud and misrepresentation of the products. To give full details of credit card is always full of apprehensions for buyers Providing credit card details can make buyers apprehensive.
    It might be good for you to review the comments you've gotten so far and repost with the corrections to the paragraphs that have already been checked. You can also take a look at the other ones to see if you can make any improvements yourself.
    I'm not a teacher, but I write for a living. Please don't ask me about 2nd conditionals, but I'm a safe bet for what reads well in (American) English.

  7. #7
    adnanmushtaq is offline Newbie
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    Default Topic was pros and cons of computer

    If you would read this passage from beginning then you would be able to understand, actually it is describing the negative effects of computer. Despite of the facts means instead of its positive effects.

  8. #8
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    Barb_D is offline Moderator
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    Default Re: please point out my mistakes

    Then you want to say "Despite these facts,..."
    I'm not a teacher, but I write for a living. Please don't ask me about 2nd conditionals, but I'm a safe bet for what reads well in (American) English.

  9. #9
    adnanmushtaq is offline Newbie
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    Default Re: please point out my mistakes

    Thanks for your valuabe time.

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