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    #1

    Please comment on how it was written. It is a translated work into English.

    1.1 Brand Characteristics
    Tea growing region is always verified.
    A Li Shan Tea Producing Factory that cooperates with our company, provides with top quality, orthodox Wu Lung Tea, which is chemical free, grown in A Li Shan. It acquired a label, certified by A Li Shan Valley Committee, to prove the region in which they grow tea. A label, stuck onto the bottle reads the authorized serial number, an assurance of the tea growing region, granted by the government. It is a genuine type of tea, to be prepared and drunk with no concerns.
    It is watched over through its production process that no chemicals have been left in teas.
    The tea processing factory picks out tea leaves, on which the chemicals left are within safe levels, rigorously. The flushes picked are used for producing tea. Experienced professionals produce tea with technical skills, following those standard processes known. All the materials that reach the factory will be examined by units concerned for any chemical leftovers. They are absolutely below National Agriculture Remnant Standard.
    Organic Authentication
    Series of Teago primary tea are made from plants of the primary forests near Golden Triangle on the border of Thai and Myanmar. To make consumers feel safe about the tea, our company applied for Organic Authentication certified by the Agricultural Department of Thai since its very beginning. It is three years now. Our company grow the tea plants by following natural agricultural law conscientiously over the years. It passed the Organic Authentication of European Union in July 2009, and the Organic Authentication of USDS, USA, again in 2010.
    2.1 Picking of Tea Leaves
    Tea picking can be done by hand or machines. Producing high quality teas requires picking of leaves by hand. A farmer pinches the stem that holds up the leaves with his thumb and index finger, and snaps it by springing the two fingers, with leaves falling off. He, for the most part, picks tender shoots and leaves. He chooses different flushes from all to make teas of different types. A flush that includes a bud and two leaves is what he wants.
    The following illustration presents the aboriginals of the northern Thai who climbed up into big trees to pick their leaves.
    2.2 Withering
    To lay the flushes under the sun for a short space of time is a step called wilting under the sun. To lay them on the shelves indoors is another step that follows, called indoor wilting. The two steps are meant to pull moisture out from the flushes. Then a farmer scrubs the flushes slightly with both hands. Some margins of leaves break when the hands scrub, so air is allowed to get through and speeds up the departure of moisture. However nowadays, they have wave flush machines to do the scrubbing.
    2.3 Fixation/Kill-green
    To pan leaves in a wok or to steam them deactivates enzymes. The step is called Kill- green. The leaves become soft and sticky afterwards, so they will not break easily in the next step called Rolling or Shaping.
    2.4 Rolling/Shaping
    The purpose of this step is to cause the tea to wrinkle and wrap around itself. Different types of leaves that undergo different levels of strength in this step may render different shapes of tea. For example, Mildly Fermented Tea and Eastern Beauty Tea have the shape of strips, while Oolong Tea has the shape of half a ball. A farmer wraps up Oolong Tea with a piece of cloth, to make it into a ball after rolling it, and squeezes it by hand or machines, this way and that way. During this process, a farmer often divests tea of the cloth and heats it in a wok, before he lays it in the air and makes it a ball again, wrapped up by a piece of cloth. He squeezes the ball over again. The more times he squeezes the ball, the more dense the tea is. In fact it takes the shape of half a ball.
    2.5 Fermentation
    After rolling the tea, cells gather towards the margins of leaves. When they touch the air and oxidize, they ferment. Steps to ferment for black tea is necessary and obvious that leads to the quality of taste. By the way, leaves being intact has much to do with fermentation. Leaves that break off, showing a wound, cannot ferment perfectly.
    2.6 Drying
    The purpose of drying teas is to stop fermenting. It leads to the shrinkage of teas and the reduction of water, which, as a result stays and moves more easily in teas. The dried off teas are what we commonly called Antirhea Chinensis.
    2.7 Sifting by Steps
    To sift by steps is what we called refinement. To select the dried teas and put them into categories leads to all levels of tea qualities. To sift with a sieve puts together teas of the same size, which are rendered neat after that. Then a worker gets rid of the stems and impurities, before he blows off tiny bits with a wind drum. Teas are grouped by their levels of quality. Top quality teas appear.
    2.8 Roasting
    To roast refined teas with heat gives off a pure and engaging smell. Different types of teas are treated with different levels of heat, which are three in number. They go from a slight one to an intense one. A slight level of heat produces a strong perfume and a slight taste. An intense level of heat makes a much lighter perfume, but a rich taste, especially when it goes down the throat.
    2.9 Brewing Teas With Flowers
    Flowers mixed with a tea base can make special flavored tea drinks. Some of the most popular flower choices are Jasmine, Yulan, Aglaia Odorata, or a chrysanthemum. To smoke fresh flowers with a tea base gives teas a perfume of flowers. The more times one smokes them, the more perfume one gets from these flavored teas, and thus the better the tea quality reaches.
    2.10 Packing of Teas
    Teas are packed in iron bottles, paper bottles, or aluminum foil bottles, to separate them from the air, prevent sunshine, improve the outward appearance, and, as a result, boost its sales. Sterile packages made of aluminum foil for teas of different types can preserve the flavor of teas for a long stretch of time, but they cannot pack strip shaped teas, which break and lower the quality easily.


    Teas grown in mountains 1000m high in Taiwan always give a rich perfume, and stay with their shape unchanged in boiled water for a long time.

    When one smokes them, they blow a smell of ripe fruit.

    Teas present an adorable green. They puff a pure fragrance, and assume a decent stance.
    They smell like flowers

    The drink renders the color of amber amazingly, and tastes like honey collected from nature, in the east, and all the miracles of a fruit.





    • Member Info
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    #2

    Please comment on how it was written. It is a translated work into English.

    1.1 Brand Characteristics
    Tea growing region is always verified.
    A Li Shan Tea Producing Factory that cooperates with our company, provides with top quality, orthodox Wu Lung Tea, which is chemical free, grown in A Li Shan. It acquired a label, certified by A Li Shan Valley Committee, to prove the region in which they grow tea. A label, stuck onto the bottle reads the authorized serial number, an assurance of the tea growing region, granted by the government. It is a genuine type of tea, to be prepared and drunk with no concerns.
    It is watched over through its production process that no chemicals have been left in teas.
    The tea processing factory picks out tea leaves, on which the chemicals left are within safe levels, rigorously. The flushes picked are used for producing tea. Experienced professionals produce tea with technical skills, following those standard processes known. All the materials that reach the factory will be examined by units concerned for any chemical leftovers. They are absolutely below National Agriculture Remnant Standard.
    Organic Authentication
    Series of Teago primary tea are made from plants of the primary forests near Golden Triangle on the border of Thai and Myanmar. To make consumers feel safe about the tea, our company applied for Organic Authentication certified by the Agricultural Department of Thai since its very beginning. It is three years now. Our company grow the tea plants by following natural agricultural law conscientiously over the years. It passed the Organic Authentication of European Union in July 2009, and the Organic Authentication of USDS, USA, again in 2010.
    2.1 Picking of Tea Leaves
    Tea picking can be done by hand or machines. Producing high quality teas requires picking of leaves by hand. A farmer pinches the stem that holds up the leaves with his thumb and index finger, and snaps it by springing the two fingers, with leaves falling off. He, for the most part, picks tender shoots and leaves. He chooses different flushes from all to make teas of different types. A flush that includes a bud and two leaves is what he wants.
    The following illustration presents the aboriginals of the northern Thai who climbed up into big trees to pick their leaves.
    2.2 Withering
    To lay the flushes under the sun for a short space of time is a step called wilting under the sun. To lay them on the shelves indoors is another step that follows, called indoor wilting. The two steps are meant to pull moisture out from the flushes. Then a farmer scrubs the flushes slightly with both hands. Some margins of leaves break when the hands scrub, so air is allowed to get through and speeds up the departure of moisture. However nowadays, they have wave flush machines to do the scrubbing.
    2.3 Fixation/Kill-green
    To pan leaves in a wok or to steam them deactivates enzymes. The step is called Kill- green. The leaves become soft and sticky afterwards, so they will not break easily in the next step called Rolling or Shaping.
    2.4 Rolling/Shaping
    The purpose of this step is to cause the tea to wrinkle and wrap around itself. Different types of leaves that undergo different levels of strength in this step may render different shapes of tea. For example, Mildly Fermented Tea and Eastern Beauty Tea have the shape of strips, while Oolong Tea has the shape of half a ball. A farmer wraps up Oolong Tea with a piece of cloth, to make it into a ball after rolling it, and squeezes it by hand or machines, this way and that way. During this process, a farmer often divests tea of the cloth and heats it in a wok, before he lays it in the air and makes it a ball again, wrapped up by a piece of cloth. He squeezes the ball over again. The more times he squeezes the ball, the more dense the tea is. In fact it takes the shape of half a ball.
    2.5 Fermentation
    After rolling the tea, cells gather towards the margins of leaves. When they touch the air and oxidize, they ferment. Steps to ferment for black tea is necessary and obvious that leads to the quality of taste. By the way, leaves being intact has much to do with fermentation. Leaves that break off, showing a wound, cannot ferment perfectly.
    2.6 Drying
    The purpose of drying teas is to stop fermenting. It leads to the shrinkage of teas and the reduction of water, which, as a result stays and moves more easily in teas. The dried off teas are what we commonly called Antirhea Chinensis.
    2.7 Sifting by Steps
    To sift by steps is what we called refinement. To select the dried teas and put them into categories leads to all levels of tea qualities. To sift with a sieve puts together teas of the same size, which are rendered neat after that. Then a worker gets rid of the stems and impurities, before he blows off tiny bits with a wind drum. Teas are grouped by their levels of quality. Top quality teas appear.
    2.8 Roasting
    To roast refined teas with heat gives off a pure and engaging smell. Different types of teas are treated with different levels of heat, which are three in number. They go from a slight one to an intense one. A slight level of heat produces a strong perfume and a slight taste. An intense level of heat makes a much lighter perfume, but a rich taste, especially when it goes down the throat.
    2.9 Brewing Teas With Flowers
    Flowers mixed with a tea base can make special flavored tea drinks. Some of the most popular flower choices are Jasmine, Yulan, Aglaia Odorata, or a chrysanthemum. To smoke fresh flowers with a tea base gives teas a perfume of flowers. The more times one smokes them, the more perfume one gets from these flavored teas, and thus the better the tea quality reaches.
    2.10 Packing of Teas
    Teas are packed in iron bottles, paper bottles, or aluminum foil bottles, to separate them from the air, prevent sunshine, improve the outward appearance, and, as a result, boost its sales. Sterile packages made of aluminum foil for teas of different types can preserve the flavor of teas for a long stretch of time, but they cannot pack strip shaped teas, which break and lower the quality easily.


    Teas grown in mountains 1000m high in Taiwan always give a rich perfume, and stay with their shape unchanged in boiled water for a long time.

    When one smokes them, they blow a smell of ripe fruit.

    Teas present an adorable green. They puff a pure fragrance, and assume a decent stance.
    They smell like flowers

    The drink renders the color of amber amazingly, and tastes like honey collected from nature, in the east, and all the miracles of a fruit.

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    #3

    Re: Please comment on how it was written. It is a translated work into English.

    To all the English experts here,
    I have been a writer for many years. Please point out obvious mistakes. Do not correct my work because of speaking habits or word preferences. Do comment righteously on how it was translated, into English. I will appreciate your expertise, if you respect my work and correct the real mistakes. If you cannot spot a mistake, I appreciate your praise. Please praise the work, if you do want to, for I am still convinced firmly that it was written perfectly. Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder. We all have different eyes, so here I hope you are not going to correct anything because you don't read it the way you speak. It was written in a more literary style, I believe. Please offer up your sincere help. Rainbow

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    #4

    Re: Please comment on how it was written. It is a translated work into English.

    To all the English experts here,
    I have been a writer for many years. Please point out obvious mistakes. Do not correct my work because of speaking habits or word preferences. Do comment righteously on how it was translated, into English. I will appreciate your expertise, if you respect my work and correct the real mistakes. If you cannot spot a mistake, I appreciate your praise. Please praise the work, if you do want to, for I am still convinced firmly that it was written perfectly. Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder. We all have different eyes, so here I hope you are not going to correct anything because you don't read it the way you speak. It was written in a more literary style, I believe. Please offer up your sincere help. Rainbow

  1. emsr2d2's Avatar
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    #5

    Re: Please comment on how it was written. It is a translated work into English.

    I don't imagine I'm the only person who thinks this post is far too long to expect us to deal with.

    I think this might be a better place for it.

    If you have any specific concerns about a particular sentence you have written, please post them individually and we will comment.

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    #6

    Re: Please comment on how it was written. It is a translated work into English.

    This looks like an automated translation- I would recommend having the text translated professionally as you're a business. This is basically weak and will not help your company and you would be well-advised to seek professional help- it's a specialist area and presenting the delights of Taiwanese teas in English requires specialised language proofreading- for me, the high mountain gunpowder Oolong I bought in Taiwan is the finest tea of all, but this text needs an incredible amount of work to get that point across.
    Last edited by Tdol; 24-Sep-2011 at 18:41. Reason: Changed 'something translated' to the text translated'

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    #7

    Re: Please comment on how it was written. It is a translated work into English.

    Since you have had such a low estimation of my work, why didn't you point out a few of the mistakes you've spotted and correct them, with the words you know. We can compare what you've presented and mine, in the hope of a discussion here. To point at my work and curse it sounds as if you were a child.

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    #8

    Re: Please comment on how it was written. It is a translated work into English.

    This looks like an automated translation- I would recommend getting something translated professionally for the benefit of your business. This does not really serve the purpose and will not help your company. I would advice you to seek professional help.- it's a specialists' area. presenting the delights of Taiwanese teas in English requires specialized language proofreading- for me, the high mountain gunpowder Oolong I bought in Taiwan is the finest tea of all, but this text needs an incredible amount of work to get that point across.
    The word" having" indicates a bad choice of word. To recommend always goes before a real action. the finest tea indicates a bad taste in English. I would suggest " the tea of top quality" or " the best tea I've ever known in my life" "fine" does not go along with "tea" In the first line,"getting sth translated professionally" shows a bad taste in English. " getting sth, which was translated professional" is much better. I didn't point it out above with bigger words, out of politeness.
    Last edited by rainbowpurple; 24-Sep-2011 at 18:18.

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    #9

    Re: Please comment on how it was written. It is a translated work into English.

    I do not think you are qualified to evaluate my work. If you want to challenge me, I do accept it.

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    #10

    Re: Please comment on how it was written. It is a translated work into English.

    I am not going to challenge you- feel free to submit it. Your supposed corrections and improvements are either wrong (I would advice- should be advise) or irrelevant (correcting a perfectly correct BrE spelling). You are free to feel that I am not qualified to evaluate your work- I do only have twenty-five years' experience of teaching and have only got a master's degree in ESL, so I will leave this for greater minds to tell you that this is a corker of a text and that it will have people queuing up for your product.

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