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  1. #1
    jood is offline Newbie
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    Default Correct my Mistakes

    Hillo
    I new in a Forumcan anebody correct my paragraph ,please
    paragraph 1:We went in the summer to Eygpt . We had a reservation in the Heloton Hotel. We were a ferquent Gest it . We made family suite ,non smokig suite with three queen size bad .It cost 5000sr included breakfast and lunch . We were in the reservation called bellman to carry us bags to rooms . We had fourth floor room number 50 with balcony . Heloton Hotel is more beautiful than onther any Hotel,but more expensive .
    How are i choese a title ?
    paragraph 2: Gifts buy ang giveI want to go to store to buy some gifts. I going to that . The first time going to the market .I do not know about the market .after ,that,I meeting a seleperson and ask for gifts department . A seleperson help me to take place. also, I ask him for flashing it . I buy a gifts.I will giveing my sister . she will taking my gifts . she will feeling happy

  2. #2
    Nicky_K is offline Junior Member
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    Default Re: Correct my Mistakes

    Quote Originally Posted by jood View Post
    Hillo
    I new in a Forumcan anebody correct my paragraph ,please
    paragraph 1:We went in the summer to Eygpt . We had a reservation in the Heloton Hotel. We were a ferquent Gest it . We made family suite ,non smokig suite with three queen size bad .It cost 5000sr included breakfast and lunch . We were in the reservation called bellman to carry us bags to rooms . We had fourth floor room number 50 with balcony . Heloton Hotel is more beautiful than onther any Hotel,but more expensive .
    How are i choese a title ?
    paragraph 2: Gifts buy ang giveI want to go to store to buy some gifts. I going to that . The first time going to the market .I do not know about the market .after ,that,I meeting a seleperson and ask for gifts department . A seleperson help me to take place. also, I ask him for flashing it . I buy a gifts.I will giveing my sister . she will taking my gifts . she will feeling happy
    Hi there,

    it looks like a homework or smth. like but anyway I'll try to make smth... Start!
    Wait. You really need to paraphrase you sentences. I'll try to fix them but not to paraphrase:

    1:We went to Egypt in the summer. We had a reservation in the Heloton Hotel. We were frequent guests there. We had family suite,which was an non smokig suite with three queen size bad. It costs us 5000sr included breakfast and lunch. We were in the reservation called bellman to carry our bags to the rooms. We had fourth floor room number 50 with balcony. Heloton Hotel is more beautiful than other Hotels, but more expensive.
    How do I choose a title?
    paragraph 2: We wanted to go to the store to buy some gifts. I was going in there. It was the first time I was going to the market. I did not know anything about the market .Later I met a sales person and asked him for gifts department. The sales person helped me to find that place. Also, I asked him for flashing it. I bought gifts, I wanted to give them to my sister. She took my gifts. She was very happy.

  3. #3
    5jj's Avatar
    5jj is offline VIP Member
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    Default Re: Correct my Mistakes

    Nicky, your willingness to help is commendable, but if you suspect this is a homework, then please do not go against forum policy and correct it.

    Also, please do not correct work until you are sure that your corrections are correct. I have had to put several things right:
    Quote Originally Posted by Nicky_K View Post
    1:We went to Egypt in the summer. We had a reservation in the Heloton Hotel. We were frequent guests there. We had family suite,which was an non-smoking suite with three queen-size bad beds. It costs us 5000sr includeding breakfast and lunch. We were in the reservation called bellman to carry our bags to the rooms. We had a fourth-floor room, number 50, with balcony. The Heloton Hotel is more beautiful than other H hotels, but more expensive.
    How do I choose a title?
    paragraph 2: We wanted to go to the store to buy some gifts. I was going in went there. It was the first time I was going had been to the market. I did not know anything about the market .Later I met a sales person and asked him for the gifts department. The sales person helped me to find that place it. Also, I asked him for flashing it. I bought gifts,; I wanted to give them to my sister. She took my gifts. She was very happy.
    The first underlined sentence should read something like: After checking in, we called a bellboy to carry our bags to our room.

    I don not know what the second underlined sentence is supposed to mean.

  4. #4
    Nicky_K is offline Junior Member
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    Default Re: Correct my Mistakes

    Quote Originally Posted by fivejedjon View Post
    -if you suspect this is a homework, then please do not go against forum policy and correct it.
    -Also, please do not correct work until you are sure that your corrections are correct.

    This text was a sequence of mistakes, so it would be easier to write it again and change everything. But I didn't want to do it. That's why I tried to fix major mistakes and I was sure that there is plenty of mistakes left...

    Actually it's a homework! We do not need to do the whole work for him/her
    As you see, I didn't because I do not go against forum policy

  5. #5
    bayia123 is offline Newbie
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    Default Re: Correct my Mistakes

    The manager
    International Coffee Shop,

    It has come to my attention that extra employees are required at the international coffee shop. I believe this is a position i can fill with confidence.

    However, my sources have not given me enough information, I would like to kindly request you about the following information:
    what is the address of the coffee shop? and what are the hours and days of work.

    your faithful
    Bayia

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