Please help me with this business email

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Niki_t

Member
Joined
Oct 17, 2011
Member Type
Student or Learner
Native Language
Bulgarian
Home Country
Bulgaria
Current Location
UK
Dear Mrs/Sir,
My name is .............and I distribute high quality wine.
I would like to introduce to you our top selection of wines and I will be grateful if you spend few minutes to see my offer.
In an attached file I’m sending you information about our most popular and successful wines in ........
Some of them are appearing in the most exquisite hotels and restaurants.
Through the years our winemakers have been awarded numerous medals from famous competitions such as Decanter, Wine Spectator and Chardonnay du Monde.
If you are interested in our wines I will be very pleased to send to you samples.
You are able to create your own sample list in the attached form which I’m sending to you.

Kind Regards
I hope it's not too bad:roll:
 

billmcd

Key Member
Joined
Mar 27, 2009
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
English
Home Country
United States
Current Location
United States
Dear Mrs/Sir,
My name is .............and I [STRIKE]distribute[/STRIKE]am a distributor of high quality wine.
I would like to introduce [STRIKE]to you [/STRIKE] you to our top selection of wines and I [STRIKE]will[/STRIKE]would be grateful if you spend few minutes to [STRIKE]see[/STRIKE] review my offer.
In an attached file I’m sending you information about our most popular and successful wines in ........
Some of them are [STRIKE]appearing[/STRIKE]available in the most exquisite hotels and restaurants.
Through the years our winemakers have been awarded numerous medals from famous competitions such as Decanter, Wine Spectator and Chardonnay du Monde.
If you are interested in our wines I [STRIKE]will[/STRIKE]would be very pleased to send to you samples.
You [STRIKE]are able to [/STRIKE] can create your own sample list [STRIKE]in[/STRIKE] using the attached form. [STRIKE]which I’m sending to you[/STRIKE].

Kind Regards
I hope it's not too bad:roll:

Not bad. :up: A few suggestions.
 

Niki_t

Member
Joined
Oct 17, 2011
Member Type
Student or Learner
Native Language
Bulgarian
Home Country
Bulgaria
Current Location
UK
Status
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