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  1. #1
    Paras is offline Newbie
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    Default Plz point out my mistakes

    It would be deemed a silly idea if I squander time for anecdote of speechless animal which frankly spoiled the beauty of a place and was perilous to human life. I had indeed ignored this inconsequential episode like all others, but very shortly I was feeling quite remorseful about how stingily and ruthlessly we behaved with debilitated dog.
    A movie about dog’s steadfastness had stirred up in me sense of respect for this creature, the way he lingered for his deceased owner for about nine years left me amazed and inspired. Even the poor man’s relatives forgot him within months. Dog became the symbol of loyalty and true love since then. Time slipped that admiration into unconscious recess, until a dreadful event rejuvenated it
    Monsoon rains had restricted all hyperactive living things to their very warm abodes; but few did not possess such abode including a poor debilitated dog whose bewilderment and meekness clicked me profoundly.
    He used to lead his wild happy life in jungle like grounds attached to hostel building during fine days; chasing and intimidating the students, fighting with fellow friends over morsel of meat and by howls removing the dead silence of surroundings.
    This weather cataclysm ruined his happy routine. Heavy showers had not only steeped his naked body, but also had made him fragile enough to become susceptible to attacks by fellow dogs and rabies virus. He was indeed a wretched being in need of sanctuary and darkness and warmth. .The only place replete with all these amenities was nearby hostel, however, His access there was prohibited, that was not really a big deal now for him , he could afford to be scofflaw when his life was at great peril. Somehow he had made his way to the inside of hostel.
    Unfortunately the dog was not endowed with ability like (chameleon) to disguise and blend in within new environment, his body badly wanted dark dry place, He devised certain poor tactics to confound residents: occupying the forbidden dark crooks, avoiding badly any direct contact with two legged taller beasts, changing places frequently in order to escape the notice or destroy his traces. (Or may be those were merely rabid features which i m exaggerating). Those tactics worked well for few days but ultimately failed. His exotic presence was awful and rare sight for inhabitants of hostel; He stood so prominent that nobody could ignore him even if s/he wanted.
    Intelligent beings had noticed this rabid dog’s repugnant presence that could be detrimental to their own health. They were partly right but his demeanor was that of sepulchral animal lacking aggression, wanting help, his situation was so grim that even an otherwise timid cat behaved intrepidly before him.
    Scrupulous residents hurried to administration and submitted their plea to immediately remove this infectious creature. Admin sent few robust guards armed with wooden sticks, they ran after feeble dog ranting n shouting.
    The poor dog was beaten with sticks in blistering rainy night; the dreadful sound waves of his shrill cries spread throughout hostel and surely fell over all intact cochlea.
    Eventually, Guards came out as victorious side, Dog had to bid farewell to unkind hosts and had to the evacuate sanctuary. Rain certainly had not stopped, bleak weather had not abated, and no body has attempted to heal his infection. He was nothing but ugly infectious beast whose exile was indispensable for health.
    We all managed to keep our selves listless; we were having great time with buddies in our warm rooms, discussing our mundane affairs …outside the dog was being welcomed by his troubles.

  2. #2
    emsr2d2's Avatar
    emsr2d2 is offline Moderator
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    Default Re: Plz point out my mistakes

    This post is too long for most of us to deal with. Please post small excerpts from it, particularly sections where you believe you have a specific problem with the language.

    Shorter posts are always easier for us to read and we like to answer specific questions.

    Please also use full words in your posts - your title should have started with the word "Please". We don't like textspeak (plz, pls, thx, u etc).
    Last edited by emsr2d2; 24-Oct-2011 at 01:09. Reason: typo

  3. #3
    Tdol is offline Editor, UsingEnglish.com
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    Default Re: Plz point out my mistakes

    The supercharged vocabulary makes it hard to follow.

  4. #4
    Paras is offline Newbie
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    Default Re: Plz point out my mistakes

    I had indeed ignored this inconsequential episode like all others, but very shortly I was feeling quite remorseful about how stingily and ruthlessly we behaved with debilitated dog.

    A movie about dog’s steadfastness had stirred up in me sense of respect for this creature, the way he lingered for his deceased owner for about nine years left me amazed and inspired. Even the poor man’s relatives forgot him within months. Dog became the symbol of loyalty and true love since then.

    Monsoon rains had restricted all hyperactive living things to their very warm abodes; but few did not possess such abode.
    He used to lead his wild happy life in jungle like grounds .
    the dreadful sound waves of his shrill cries spread throughout hostel.
    I am sorry for not following rules of the forum.Next i will try to be careful. I have difficulty in using past perfect and simple past, i wanted to ask whether in this note i have used them rightly or not.

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