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    #1

    Will anyone please revise my report?

    Hello!
    This is the exam task:
    You have had a class discussion about traffic problems in your country, and your teacher has asked you to write a report on transport where you live. Describe the forms of public transport available in your area, and suggest how they could be improved.

    Public transports

    The purpose of this report is to describe the forms of public transport available in my area and also explain suggestions as they could be improved.

    Living in a little town close to the mountains, actually here there are not many kinds of public transport. Though, we can find buses which carry every day some workers and students and the train which is by far the fastest transport in my area.

    Certainly the services given by these two transports are not excellent. In fact I see a lot of disorganisation and the timetables not always are followed. As regards cleanness, according to the majority of citizens the trains are quite messy and filthy, besides fares are going up.

    Nevertheless, on other hand, public transports have lower accidents rates than using private cars, indeed they prevent every year many deaths and injuries. Moreover, the use of trains reduces the emission of C02 and traffic jam.

    To sum up, I would still suggest a greater use of public transports to save the environment.


    • Member Info
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    #2

    Re: Will anyone please revise my report?

    Here is my revision. Of course another person might have different ideas to mine but I hope this is helpful to you. :)


    Local Public Transport

    The purpose of this report is to describe the forms of public transport available in my area and also suggest how they could be improved.

    There are not many kinds of public transport locally as I live in a little town close to the mountains. There are buses which carry some workers and students every day and a railway which is by far the fastest transport in my area.

    The service on the buses and trains is not excellent. In fact I see a lot of disorganisation and the timetables are not always followed. Regarding cleanliness, the majority of citizens consider the trains to be quite messy and filthy, besides which fares are going up.

    Nevertheless, our public transport has lower accident rates than the use of private cars. Indeed they prevent many deaths and injuries every year. Moreover, the use of trains reduces the emission of C02 and eases traffic jams.

    To sum up, I would suggest greater use of public transport to save the environment.

    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Student or Learner
      • Native Language:
      • Italian
      • Home Country:
      • Italy
      • Current Location:
      • Italy

    • Join Date: Oct 2011
    • Posts: 19
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    #3

    Re: Will anyone please revise my report?

    Thank you very much for your revision!

    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Interested in Language
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    #4

    Re: Will anyone please revise my report?

    I've noticed an error on re-reading my version:
    "Nevertheless, our public transport has lower accident rates than the use of private cars. Indeed they prevent many deaths and injuries every year."
    It would be better to say -- "Nevertheless our public transport has a lower accident rate than the use of private cars. Indeed it prevents many deaths and injuries every year."

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