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  1. #1
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    Default Writing a News Article Title

    Father Divested of Custody and Parental Rights of Child after Denying Mother’s Visitation Rights

    Domestic Relations Court’s Decision in Favor of Plaintiff


    Hi,

    I am trying to write a news article and wondering what rules are there for writing the title.

    Are the above acceptable as titles?

    The first one is main title and the second one is sub-title.

    I am not sure whether I should put a verb like "is" or "gets" in front of "divested" for clearer meaning.

    Also, I want to know to what extent the omission of articles is allowed. As for my case, do I have to put articles at the very front of the title and the subtitle?

    Any feedback would be greatly appreciated.
    Last edited by rainous; 07-Dec-2011 at 02:30.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Writing a News Article Title

    Way too long for a headline.


    Father Divested of Custody and Parental Rights of Child after Denying Motherís Visitation Rights

    Father Denies Mother Visition, Loses Custody

    The second headline is both redundant but non-informative.
    Obviously, if it's a custody battle, it's Domestic Relations.
    You're making the reader assume the plaintiff is the mother.
    But you also just gave the outcome in the main header, so what extra informatin are you providing here that you haven't already given?
    I'm not a teacher, but I write for a living. Please don't ask me about 2nd conditionals, but I'm a safe bet for what reads well in (American) English.

  3. #3
    rainous's Avatar
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    Default Re: Writing a News Article Title

    Thanks for your comment

    One quick question:

    I am thinking of replacing "denying" with "refusing".

    Do you think that's a good idea or it doesn't make much difference?

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Writing a News Article Title

    I think it's a better choice, actually.

    Go for it!
    I'm not a teacher, but I write for a living. Please don't ask me about 2nd conditionals, but I'm a safe bet for what reads well in (American) English.

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Writing a News Article Title

    What about "interfering with"?

    It just popped up in my head.

    I have a hunch you gotta like this one even better.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Writing a News Article Title

    For a headline? You "gotta" think shorter!
    I'm not a teacher, but I write for a living. Please don't ask me about 2nd conditionals, but I'm a safe bet for what reads well in (American) English.

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