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  1. #1
    ichhassemandarinen is offline Newbie
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    Letter of Motivation --> letter straight to hell? help my please :)

    Huhu,
    I just wrote a letter of motivation but I think it was a really hard task and because I am always really bad at writing ( grammar stuff) I would be really happy if someone would take a look over it and maybe correct it if its not to much work
    thanks a lot


    ...
    Dear Sir or Madam


    I´m writing this “Letter of Motivation” to apply for the “(some uni intern programm)” spaces offered by your university. My purpose in this letter is to tell you something about myself and why I selected the University of ..... as my first choice.


    During the time we all visit school many people discover the things that they are good in and also what we are absolutely not compatible with. For me the interesting part in school live were history lessons, my English classes and also skipping the classes which appeared to me as not really that necessary (like chemistry for instance) with sitting in the library and getting lost in the beautiful world of dramatic and fantastic stories. After I finished school in 2011 I was at first totally confused what to do with my life. I thought about what I would like to do and what my favorite degree course should contain of. “Lehramt” (teaching degree) was what came to my mind first but as I read more about it in different sources I recognized it was not what I really wanted.


    I nearly gave up, but then I found something that appeared to me like god answering my dreams: Anglophone studies. I thought it was just what I wanted and now after starting to study it I am absolutely confident that it really is. I am able to combine my interest for literature to a wonderful language and the study of the parts of the world where it is used.


    For me it is absolutely important to do really good in my studies and I know how important it is for someone who studies a foreign language to spend time in the country where this language origins. Not just to improve the existing language skills but also to learn about the people living in this country, how they live and what makes them unique.


    I was in Great Britain one time in 2008 and visited a language school for four weeks and in that time I lived with a family which was absolutely gorgeous. The first day I spent at their house I felt like everything I learned in school did no good to my real live English speaking. I was not able to understand half the words they were using and the strong British accent made it hard for me, too. During school I never completely understood how hard it really is to learn a foreign language but the few weeks in Great Britain changed my point of view.


    At first I felt miserable but after just a few days my situation changed, I became accustomed to their way of speaking and they all tried really hard to make it more easy for me, and I think it worked.


    Back in Germany I discovered a whole new sense of the language and now that I am finally able to study it I am absolutely sure I have to go back to Great Britain and learn all the things that I was not able to learn in this short four weeks.


    In my first weeks in university I heard about the “.......”-program and visited their homepage to find out which international partnerships are existent. I also visited every websites of the British partner universities. First I searched for one university that is located near to .........., the only place I ever was to in Great Britain.
    But after comparing the Universities with each other I shortly found out that the one farthest away from this city made the best impression to me. The University of .......


    On your university homepage is a video of a girl talking about her duration of study in ..... . She tells about how she was able to spent time abroad in Germany and France but also talks about how perfect this university is, and she is really convincing. She says that especially for studying languages it is a wonderful place. I myself are searching for a place where I can get help for every language problem that I have and a competent number of people which will lead me on my way to discover my own future.


    I read everything on the homepage and also searched for reports made by former students of ..... University. And I think I found a place where I can get a whole lot of support for my ideas and that a year at your university would open me a lot of options for my future carrier. I think that your university is the perfect place for me to get everything I want and I truly hope that in return to that I could be the perfect candidate for you, too. I will work really hard to meet your expectations.


    The chance to study at your University would make me truly happy and now I really hope that after my statements you will give me this opportunity.




    Sincerely yours
    .....

  2. #2
    mayita1usa's Avatar
    mayita1usa is offline Member
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      • English Teacher
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      • American English
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      • United States
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    Exclamation Re: Letter of Motivation --> letter straight to hell? help my please :)

    I think you might get more help if you posted this in the Editing and Writing forum:
    Editing & Writing Topics - UsingEnglish.com ESL Forum

    Here we are more focused on specific grammar and usage questions.

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