AMK-future writer
Junior Member
- Joined
- Jan 3, 2012
- Member Type
- Interested in Language
- Native Language
- Urdu
- Home Country
- Pakistan
- Current Location
- Pakistan
I have been writing a novel after reading thirty-four novel approximately. i think that (usingenglish.com) will help me get some more knowledge. i want to know that what people thinks about my book. please tell me how well it is written. comments will be appreciated. waiting for comments.:-D
CRIMSON RIDDLE:
CHAPTER I: finally, the hegamont becomes the king
“At last, I found.” He shouted with joy, gripping the book in his right hand while standing on two golden rods more likely elephant teeth. They were two of them, their size was about 7 foot or above endings meeting at the book that was lying opened on a violet stand.
“What is it that you were searching for, master?” His servant said. His face was not ugly but was better than other four solider standing still in front of the golden rods. Every solider there was wearing green suit with coat and a hat.
“First of all” He raged “I am no more master.” Still holding the book interested on what was written. His expressions showing that he was impressed by the secret golden book.
“Than what you are my master?” solider replied. Others expressions were waiting for the respond. More likely, what was going to happen?
“I am the king of this planet.” He cried with joy, his eyes were now off from the book and were now at his solider who was continuously asking questions. On the other hand the solider was feeling that the end of his life was this, this sticky end.
“Now if you won’t mind. May I ask a question, my king?” the other solider replied who was behind the depressed solider. He was somehow braver than he looks for he barely had a meat on his skeleton.
Yes, you all can ask as much questions as you want for then after I will give you no choice. He replied and came down from the gold slide on which he was standing on.
“Sir-oh...King but how you are so sure that you will be able to defeat lord drake Jordan.”
“Why is it difficult” the future king replied.
Even for you it is as I think it’s really difficult, very difficult you see he has approximately 90 and 300 5 headed dragons for security and if you ask more than half of the planet is giving him support. All of them believe he is the king of planet ‘pilotonio’.
“This is the greatest sign of being coward, having this much big army but what good it will do when the whole army including dragons cannot defeat a single person.”
“But who is that person that won’t be crushed by this much army” the solider replied amazed.
“It’s me. The king HEGAMONT and you all will see that how those cowards will run away and will never return.” He replied, and looked upon the other solider leaving the other one as it is. He was now drinking energy drink for he loosed all the strength drained during the eye contact with Hegamont.
Edward, don’t try to move or it will be the worse for you. Hegamont said breaking his eye contact with second one and looking upon the first one.
“But why I am to be stuck here. There is no reason to it.” He replied at once.
CRIMSON RIDDLE:
CHAPTER I: finally, the hegamont becomes the king
“At last, I found.” He shouted with joy, gripping the book in his right hand while standing on two golden rods more likely elephant teeth. They were two of them, their size was about 7 foot or above endings meeting at the book that was lying opened on a violet stand.
“What is it that you were searching for, master?” His servant said. His face was not ugly but was better than other four solider standing still in front of the golden rods. Every solider there was wearing green suit with coat and a hat.
“First of all” He raged “I am no more master.” Still holding the book interested on what was written. His expressions showing that he was impressed by the secret golden book.
“Than what you are my master?” solider replied. Others expressions were waiting for the respond. More likely, what was going to happen?
“I am the king of this planet.” He cried with joy, his eyes were now off from the book and were now at his solider who was continuously asking questions. On the other hand the solider was feeling that the end of his life was this, this sticky end.
“Now if you won’t mind. May I ask a question, my king?” the other solider replied who was behind the depressed solider. He was somehow braver than he looks for he barely had a meat on his skeleton.
Yes, you all can ask as much questions as you want for then after I will give you no choice. He replied and came down from the gold slide on which he was standing on.
“Sir-oh...King but how you are so sure that you will be able to defeat lord drake Jordan.”
“Why is it difficult” the future king replied.
Even for you it is as I think it’s really difficult, very difficult you see he has approximately 90 and 300 5 headed dragons for security and if you ask more than half of the planet is giving him support. All of them believe he is the king of planet ‘pilotonio’.
“This is the greatest sign of being coward, having this much big army but what good it will do when the whole army including dragons cannot defeat a single person.”
“But who is that person that won’t be crushed by this much army” the solider replied amazed.
“It’s me. The king HEGAMONT and you all will see that how those cowards will run away and will never return.” He replied, and looked upon the other solider leaving the other one as it is. He was now drinking energy drink for he loosed all the strength drained during the eye contact with Hegamont.
Edward, don’t try to move or it will be the worse for you. Hegamont said breaking his eye contact with second one and looking upon the first one.
“But why I am to be stuck here. There is no reason to it.” He replied at once.