Hi teachers,
Could you proofread this short story? It is for low intermediate students.

Julia andher boyfriend are going to the cinema now. They are walking really fast because they are
in a hurry. The film started ten minutes ago. It is one of Charles Kayís horror films. Afriend of Juliaís saw it a few weeks ago, and she told her that the film was very scary. When they finally arrived at the cinema, all the tickets
were sold out, so they didnít see the film that night.

Is it better,
'When they finally arrived at the cinema, all the tickets had been sold.'?

Thanks in advance